What about being in the right place, at the right time? Latching on to crosses, pouncing on mistakes. There's much more to the game, and far more sources of goals than 1 v 1, defender vs attacker.
I can see that, and they will be far better, but that doesn't disprove the scenario.
Ok, let's test your scenario.
Forget about the 4th Division. Write to Sheffield FC. If you could get 8 in 26 games in the 4th division, you would be banging them in in the Northern Premier League. Ask them if you can play up front in their next game. Offer to pay them £50 for the privilege (I will gladly repay you that money when you get a game). Obviously, when the goals start flowing in the NPL, scouts from up the pyramid will come looking and it won't be long before all the 4th Division managers realise they have been wasting their money and everyone on here will be getting 8 goals in the 4th Division.
If you think Sheffield is too high a level, try someone at the 14th level of the pyramid - Kiveton Park will probably give you a game - and work your way up from there.