Cliches I fucking despise

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"this group" - you mean, the squad

"in this moment" - you mean now, learn English please

Client: At this moment in time

Me: Which moment is that then?

Client: This moment in time

Me: Oh not the previous moment in time then?

Client: No, this moment in time

Me: So that's three moments in time now then

I didn't get the order but, (unheard of for me, but he had been arsy with me) I enjoyed winding him up ;)
 
Client: At this moment in time

Me: Which moment is that then?

Client: This moment in time

Me: Oh not the previous moment in time then?

Client: No, this moment in time

Me: So that's three moments in time now then

I didn't get the order but, (unheard of for me, but he had been arsy with me) I enjoyed winding him up ;)

"I'll ring you back" - no, you fucking won't, you lying bastard
 
Client: At this moment in time

Me: Which moment is that then?

Client: This moment in time

Me: Oh not the previous moment in time then?

Client: No, this moment in time

Me: So that's three moments in time now then

I didn't get the order but, (unheard of for me, but he had been arsy with me) I enjoyed winding him up ;)
Precisely why I'll never make a salesman.

My company keep trying to push me down that route because they say I'd be brilliant at it. Unfortunately, I know better in the fact that I wouldn't be able to keep a diplomatic gob on it!!
 
Precisely why I'll never make a salesman.

My company keep trying to push me down that route because they say I'd be brilliant at it. Unfortunately, I know better in the fact that I wouldn't be able to keep a diplomatic gob on it!!

I had a successful sales career, both external and internal sales.

My maxim was "You have two ears and 1 mouth, use accordingly!" ;)

Normally I could deal with the odd arsy person but this guy was just so patronising I'd had enough.

Sales is a great life, give it a try
 
"The cross was delivered with pin-point accuracy"
- the forward had run 20 yards and evaded a rugby scrum to get his head on it.
 
hes lost the dressing room,,,, needs a sat nav
wed got that game won till they scored ,,, well dah
keeping their shape ,,,all on a diet
I brought him on to freshen us up ,,,I panicked
His experience helps him be in the right place,,,, as his legs have gone
he was right on the line ,,,Baxters snorting again
rostrons in the zone ,,,,no idea
 



"second season syndrome".

I wasn't aware that newly promoted teams if they had the temerity to stay up had some mythical points deduction which made the second season eminently harder than the first.

I think if United had managed to stay in the Prem, we may have found the never been used before or since 3S points deduction you talk of.
 
he still had a lot in his locker ..... hes been pinching the towels
he is deceptively good,,,,,,,,,, he keeps bunging me 200 quid out of his wages to play
Burridge is a very brave keeper ,,, hes fucking mental
attackers dont like coming up against him ,,,,,, hes got psoriasis
 
"I know it's an old cliché but......"

"I'm as sick as a parrot"

"It'll be a cracker" (usually followed by a dour nil nil).

"We'll just have to work harder" (Why didn't you work hard in the first place?)

"United together";)
 
I had a successful sales career, both external and internal sales.

My maxim was "You have two ears and 1 mouth, use accordingly!" ;)

Normally I could deal with the odd arsy person but this guy was just so patronising I'd had enough.

Sales is a great life, give it a try

I think I'd be tempted but I have a fairly cushy number now. I do a bit of sales indirectly through carrying out trade days demonstrating our products to end users but conversing with people at this level affords me the opportunities to be a bit looser with the lip.

Perfect example, I turned up for a trade day (that had been organised in advance) once in Eastbourne and when I introduced myself and the company I represented the branch manager said "And?"
Quick as a flash I replied "Are you fucking kidding me?" As a salesman that would have been a disastrous reply :D
 
"It really is a sad way to end the game" in reference to penalty's - the fact neither team looked like they would score and it is the only way to end it never gets said.

"we might see something a bit special here" - Usually when some over paid prima-donna lines up to take a free kick corner or Penalty, and very rarely do we get anything other than the same old shit he normally does.

"Well, they will be celebrating tonight"

"He's full of energy" - usually said about a Defensive midfielder who's only talent is running.
 



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