Best awayday stories.

All advertisments are hidden for logged in members, why not log in/register?

seanbeenstattoo

seanbeenstattoo

Piss down the back of their legs. Precious.
Joined
Dec 11, 2010
Messages
3,596
Reaction score
5,223
Location
sheffield
Best one I heard was actually funnier than any one of many I've been on.
When the pigs where at Highbury in a cup semi against Brighton,(thank fuck they lost),a mate of mine ran a coach from Ecco.
They stopped at a nice country pub mid journey whih had been pre arranged for lunch and beers. This was a typical open fire loads of decorations on stone walls type of place. They ate,deank and set off on the journey to London.
After just a few miles old bill came flying by lights flashing sirens wailing and pulled the coach over onto the hard shoulder.
The coach was boarded by a sergeant and a pc who having spoke to the driver took the coach mike and gave the pi fans a choice.
Return what was taken from the pub or return to Sheffield.
After a few minutes deliberation there was a clinking clanking as countlesss brass items from the fireplaces and surrounds were gudgingly passed forwards.
The police gathered all these items together before the sergeant made one more announcement asking "Are we forgetting something"
After a few glances were exchanged one last item was returned from the back seat forwards.
As it passed from hand to hand on its journey it meeowed loud and long.
Much as I hate the bastards that is total fucking quality.
 



Two pigs used to run executive coach trips that included a meal before the game and an hours free bar on the way back with chips and sandwiches. Deciding to see if Blades fans fancied it they opened it up for a Boxing Day trip to Arsenal (after our first wins v Forest and then Boxing Day. We were dropped at the Barbican Hotel in London for the meal and the hotel manager asked us all to leave, not because of bad behaviour but because we were drinking the place dry and he was concerned the hotel visitors could be left devoid of beer. (We trooped out around the corner and McBlade and Block D found a shithole with strippers).

This didn't set any alarm bells ringing with the organisers and by the time we we stopped at the Northampton Post House for the free bar everyone was gagging for a beer as we couldn't get one at Highbury. The chips and sandwiches came out and it was one hour free bar, beer lager and Guinness only. I clearly recall there were no half full pots left around as people abused it. When the bill came the organisers nearly had a stroke as a hundred thirsty Blades had devoured amounts of beer that meant they had ( they claimed) cost them over a grand.

There was a wedding reception in the function suite which led to loads of Blades dancing with Bridesmaids and locals wives and girlfriend while loads of miserable husbands etc looked on.

They never ran one for us again.
 
Middlesbrough played a pre season friendly at Blackpool some years ago

After the game there was a Middlesbrough fan absolutely bladdered in a pub

As it got closer to closing time he passed out

The other Boro fans in the pub didn't know what to do with him so they put him on the coach and took him back home

They laid him out on the coach and as they approached Middlesbrough they rifled through his pockets to find some ID and an address

Having found his name and address the coach driver said " I'll drop him off at home, he lives near the depot"

The coach driver arrived at the fellas house but the bloke was still asleep and he couldn't wake him

So he banged on the door.....,,.no answer

He banged louder.........still no answer

He almost banged the door down and the next door neighbour opened the bedroom window and said "What the fuck are you doing at this time of night"

The coach driver said " Does John Smith live here"

The neighbour said "Yes he does but he's taken his family to Blackpool for a weeks holiday"
 
Sean Thornton said:
Two pigs used to run executive coach trips that included a meal before the game and an hours free bar on the way back with chips and sandwiches. Deciding to see if Blades fans fancied it they opened it up for a Boxing Day trip to Arsenal (after our first wins v Forest and then Boxing Day. We were dropped at the Barbican Hotel in London for the meal and the hotel manager asked us all to leave, not because of bad behaviour but because we were drinking the place dry and he was concerned the hotel visitors could be left devoid of beer. (We trooped out around the corner and McBlade and Block D found a shithole with strippers).

This didn't set any alarm bells ringing with the organisers and by the time we we stopped at the Northampton Post House for the free bar everyone was gagging for a beer as we couldn't get one at Highbury. The chips and sandwiches came out and it was one hour free bar, beer lager and Guinness only. I clearly recall there were no half full pots left around as people abused it. When the bill came the organisers nearly had a stroke as a hundred thirsty Blades had devoured amounts of beer that meant they had ( they claimed) cost them over a grand.

There was a wedding reception in the function suite which led to loads of Blades dancing with Bridesmaids and locals wives and girlfriend while loads of miserable husbands etc looked on.

They never ran one for us again.
Click to expand...


Blocky is recovering from a cardiac issue mate. If you know how to contact him I'm sure he'd appreciate your best wishes. I work with him so can provide contact details if you don't have them and would like to wish him the best.
 
seanbeenstattoo said:
Blocky is recovering from a cardiac issue mate. If you know how to contact him I'm sure he'd appreciate your best wishes. I work with him so can provide contact details if you don't have them and would like to wish him the best.
Click to expand...


Already spoken to him SBT. Bit of a shock. Saw him at Oxford. Says he's feeling better and hopes to be back for the Coventry game.
 
seanbeenstattoo said:
Blocky is recovering from a cardiac issue mate. If you know how to contact him I'm sure he'd appreciate your best wishes. I work with him so can provide contact details if you don't have them and would like to wish him the best.
Click to expand...
I'd like to offer my support too SBT if you wouldn't mind?
I'd do it on BM, but just had to re-register and don't have permission to post yet.
 
Ah, the old satellite delay wins again. What with that and ageing fingers/brain, I don't stand a chance nowadays :(
 
seanbeenstattoo said:
You and me both mate.
Click to expand...
Don't know why I liked that comment really. Let's be honest, there's nowt to f*****g like about getting older really is there?!
By the time you have acquired some useful info by years of experience, you're too flaming old to put it to good use!
Wish I was 18 again and now what I know now ;)

edit: Actually, no I don't. I'd probably be arrested or dead already!
 



GreasyChipBeattie said:
Don't know why I liked that comment really. Let's be honest, there's nowt to f*****g like about getting older really is there?!
By the time you have acquired some useful info by years of experience, you're too flaming old to put it to good use!
Wish I was 18 again and now what I know now ;)

edit: Actually, no I don't. I'd probably be arrested or dead already!
Click to expand...

I've quit worrying about it just love my life and 2 daughters and little trips abroad every month. Plus the Blades and my dear friends. Frankly the rest can go fuck itself.
 
seanbeenstattoo said:
I've quit worrying about it just love my life and 2 daughters and little trips abroad every month. Plus the Blades and my dear friends. Frankly the rest can go fuck itself.
Click to expand...

In all seriousness SBT, I wouldn't change a thing.
Glad to hear you're sorted with lots to enjoy in life. There are plenty that don't.
Plus, hearing of Blocky's issues makes you realise that life's too short to worry about stoopid stuff.
 
GreasyChipBeattie said:
In all seriousness SBT, I wouldn't change a thing.
Glad to hear you're sorted with lots to enjoy in life. There are plenty that don't.
Plus, hearing of Blocky's issues makes you realise that life's too short to worry about stoopid stuff.
Click to expand...


Bang right mate. Im only sorted having battled the big C and refused to lay down. Every day is precious and to be made the most of mate.
 
GreasyChipBeattie said:
Had the same battle mate. 8 years ago, lost one of me nuts. All clear now, but causes a bit of a re-think somewhat dunnit?!!
Click to expand...

It certainly does. I got diagnosed with stage 3 bladder cancer. Had quite a lot of my insides removed and a new bladder made out of a chunk of my large intestine. 12 hour operation. Worth it though. No bag and I piss like I always did. Stood up through mi knob.LOL.
 
seanbeenstattoo said:
It certainly does. I got diagnosed with stage 3 bladder cancer. Had quite a lot of my insides removed and a new bladder made out of a chunk of my large intestine. 12 hour operation. Worth it though. No bag and I piss like I always did. Stood up through mi knob.LOL.
Click to expand...
Kinell, makes mine sound like a f*****g holiday!
Glad you're well mate. Here's to many more years of knob-pisses and supporting the RAWWs.
 
prince albert said:
Nice to hear that your OK, sounds like your already sorted for MK fancy dress you're already wearing your womble outfit:)
Click to expand...
Ha! Part of what kept my pecker up was my wonderful wife and her nutty sense of humour PA.
I had the op 4 days before Christmas and after telling the surgeon she had a gap on our Christmas tree, she asked if he wouldn't mind her having the offending article to hang there before looking at me and bursting into song, 'Remember you're a womble'!
 
On a similar vein to the OP a story that didn't involve me but a bunch on mates.

It was Oldham away around the early 90s. We'd gone by car and met some mates there who'd gone by transit van. We arranged to meet up back in Sheffield on Ecclesall Road. We got back 1st and then they arrived about an hour later, pissing themselves and couldn't wait to show us what they'd acquired on their journey home.

They opened the transit back doors - and a fully grown sheep jumped out. It was funny at the time, but the poor thing looked a bit out of place outside Champs
 
seanbeenstattoo said:
It certainly does. I got diagnosed with stage 3 bladder cancer. Had quite a lot of my insides removed and a new bladder made out of a chunk of my large intestine. 12 hour operation. Worth it though. No bag and I piss like I always did. Stood up through mi knob.LOL.
Click to expand...
I remember reading on BM that you'd been in hospital but I didn't realise it was so serious. Hope everything's OK and you're in full remission.

And best wishes to Block D, never met him but he seemed like a decent bloke.
 



BushBlade said:
I remember reading on BM that you'd been in hospital but I didn't realise it was so serious. Hope everything's OK and you're in full remission.

And best wishes to Block D, never met him but he seemed like a decent bloke.
Click to expand...


Thankyou BB. Had the ever popular annual camera up the Japs eye a couple of weeks back and all is still ok. Blocky is indeed a decent bloke and a good mate. I've been in tough this morning and he's on the mend. We discussed a day to watch Yorkshire when he's well enough to have a day out.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

R
'Memries' Blackburn v Blades 28 February 1970
Replies
6
Views
323
ancientblade
A
Y
Guilherme Ramos
Replies
11
Views
2K
Iceybabey
I
W
Selles v wilder
Replies
27
Views
2K
wadblade
wadblade
Maurice Maurice
Excellent performance
Replies
21
Views
2K
loyalblade95
loyalblade95
Champagneblade
Simply enjoying the matches
2
Replies
34
Views
2K
jt64
jt64

All advertisments are hidden for logged in members, why not log in/register?

All advertisments are hidden for logged in members, why not log in/register?

Back
Top Bottom