My take ...

[BornOnShorehamStreet]

I don't doubt the 'mules' were good basketball players at all. You have to 'know the game' to be that shit on purpose.

My point is that United play like they are being paid to be shit. It's like they have been briefed to be mules for every fucking team playing for us.

And yep - I agree with everything else. I saw Victor Borge at Sheffield City Hall way back in time as he was one of my dad and my favourite comedians. He was utterly brilliant even at being shite at playing piano. Les Dawson too.

pommpey

Not forgetting Tommy Cooper's attempt at magic

 

[maidmarion]

Wonderful. I respect your integrity, righteousness and moral fortitude.

I however don't give a cat's cunt about that fucking bastard nonsense. Fuck that shit. Load of twatting fuckspunking bloody bastard pissflappery, in my humble opinion.

Next?

pommpey

Yay, Pompey is back......

 

[Espania blade]

Yet another great example of the reality of Sheffield United, 2020-21 season.

Ever used to watch The Harlem Globetrotters on World of Sport? Dickie Davies used to gleefully announce the next ten minutes was watching them do tricks and play round what we believed, as kids, were another professional set of basketball players but really, they were just 'mules', people put there to make the Medowlark and Curly look fucking good. They'd be sold every feint, allow the showmen to dribble dazzlingly past them and the Globetrotters would end most moves with the basketball bouncing off arses, elbows and Curly's cock to be fucking slamdunked each time to the joy of the armrollin', whoopin'-and-a-hollerin', gun-totin', uncle-fuckin' audience. Nowadays they've moved onto the homoerotic vision of WWF bellends rolling about with each other and hitting each other with aluminium stepladders and chairs to quell their lust for violence (and wonder why schools and shopping malls get shot up regularly). But I digress ...

We look like a 'demonstration opposition team'. If we are not making naïve endeavour to play it out from the back like the grown up teams in the PL do (note: Arsenal tried to do this a few weeks ago and were bitten badly) then we are playing like the Globetrotters hapless opponents, simply providing obstacles in the way to play around. Aside from some lukewarm performances, tonight we played exactly like we are going to be - a Championship side. And any detractors or delusionals out there who think that because we are a freshly relegated side and will hence 'do a Norwich/Watford' and wank copiously over next season's opposition and secure promotion by Easter needs to wake the fuck up. Tonight is 'Wilder' writ large and lit up with sparkly beams. This is his team and for large portions we cluelessly played by his system and rules. And Arsenal were all over us, even weakened by injury themselves.

I don't really think we did that badly in defence, as usual. But as ever, the three free-kick dummies in midfield were dreadfully shit, once again. Please ... everyone ... recognise that even next season, we will only progress with these three replaced. Berge will go, and even with the disappointingly low fee we command for his transfer to the subs bench of one of the top six, the first thing we buy is midfield talent. We don't need disconnected, demoralised and effectively dismal number-makers. We need people who will turn the game, attack from all positions and see the opportunities. Norwood ... have a look at that ball straight through our cetre which turned Ampadu and put Lacazette in with the move he'd been waiting all fucking game to make. You did it versus Plymouth for Sharp. Why can't you put Brewster through with the same fucking pass? Honestly, he spends all game pissing about pretending he is the Regista ... and just ends up being robbed, played around and simply watching Arsenal negate his position. If he gets the ball, he looks up, there's nothing. He dawdles, looking for the inevitable, readable long pass and suddenly its off his feet or he's pressed backwards. With Lundstram, it's business as usual for this chancer. He arrived as a practically useless replacement for a hole created by Coutts's injury and strove to impress, lucked out and flattered to deceive last year (he even had me fooled) and now is back to where he is and should be. Division One standards of output. And Fleck now just doesn't seem to remember what LCM means. You might as well hang a Blades shirt on a 5'8" free kick dummy. Even when it was blatantly obvious (like, all fucking season, mind ... ) that 5-3-2 isn't working and we went 4-3-1-2 with Osborn doing his level best to make some sort of impact in the Duffy role, the midfield three were still a woeful dollop of peanutty shit. There was just nothing to offer. They continued to do what they'd always fucking done. Receive, get closed down, panic like fuck, fail to turn and move up the pitch, go backwards, back to Ramsdale. We failed to get out of our fucking half for much of the game either in or out of possession and Arsenal just waited for us to fuck up, and we did. First goal, ball watching. Second goal, Lundstram at his best and third goal a mastery lesson in how to put your forward in on goal.

Ramsdale 6/10: Can't give him much more to be honest. He was beaten by three goals, none of which - maybe the second - he could do owt about, but was fucking lucky with that daft driven clearance in the first half. Seen them go in.
Baldock 5/10: He's losing his rag more and more each game. Everything around him is now unfamiliar territory, he can't push up the pitch much these days and everything his going from diarrhoea to blood for him. Wouldn't be surprised to see a transfer request in the close season from him
Ampadu 5.5/10: Had a reyt tussle with Lacazette and picked up a pointless yellow near the end, but I understand his frustration and anger. Never mind. A few games left and he can fuck off back to Chelsea and get loaned out to a football team who gives a fuck
Egan 5/10: Still seemingly finding his feet but some timely interventions and tackles, but was flat footed for Lacazette's first. Ironic that one of our shots on goal was his tame volley.
Stevens 2/10: Fucking rubbish. Error prone and exposed. A real weak link now at LCB
Osborn 6/10: Played really well in comparison to everyone else, but on balance isn't technical or clever enough to play in the top flight. Ran his arse off in the No10 spot, for the sum total of jack shit
Lundstram 0/10: Abject, talentless and way, way out of his depth. That ball for their second summed him up. If you catch him when the opposition score these days in the replays, there isn't a scrap of disappointment or frustration on his Easter Island dish. Can't wait for the statement, 'Released - John Lundstram'. Be fucking interested which daft arsed club, even at Division One level, takes this miscreant on.
Norwood 2/10: Generous marking, I know. We covered endlessly how ineffective Norwood is and I don't intend outlining - again - what a pisspoor player he is and continues to be. After tonight's non-productive showing I'd like to see anyone justify why they reckon he'd be any better next season. He needs to go. We have suffered enough. At least we didn't get that many corners tonight to hammer further near-post-nails into his footballing coffin
Fleck 2/10: Another player with whom we have finished business with. His time is done, and I don't see him imposing next season too.
McGoldrick 5/10: Tried to be involved. Scuffed our only real chance but Xakha was all over him. He seems to be the only person in our team who 'gets football' and is dangerous. But that is stretching reality and belief. IN effect he's not really good enough to compete at this level either, even though he is our top scorer, in reality, if we'd got our shit together he'd be our fourth top scorer by now.
Burke 2/10: Bloody woeful. Fast as fuck, but in my eyes, not even nearly a footballer. I would love to hear Wilder and Knill's reasoning why the swap with WBA for Callum Robinson was so fucking compelling

McBurnie 1/10: No pub-stuff tonight. But the first thing he did was pass to their player. Twenty million.
Brewster 1/10: Hardly got a touch. Yet again. Twenty three million.
Mousset 0/10: What the flying fuck is this bloke doing at the club? Ten million and he spoons a chance round the post by a billion fucking light years. Fuck's sake, fatty. Kozluk or Montgomery would have scored that.

Heckingbottom 0/10: Being driven from remote from Wilder's PS4.

pommpey

I agree with 99% of that, bit harsh on Ramm'y, he was obviously being told/trained to make those sort of goal kicks, but it is a dangerous game in the Prem' as he nearly got found out. - I do like to watch him though, you never know what he is going to next.
Methinks he might be a Pep whatever his name is at Man' City type of goalkeeper, he likes his keepers to be in the game almost like an outfield player, I think Ramm'y fits that as he likes to come out and play, comes up for the occasional corner, makes great saves - and then lets a dopey shot beat him.

I think you might be right about Furious, he might be looking at a fresh start and would attract a good number of clubs.

A lot need moving on, but how do you do that when they have lucrative contracts that they know they won't get anywhere else?

Thoroughly depressing times, how can we fall so spectacular - I know - it's the United way!!

 

[blade too long]

Been banging on about Norwood now for ooh ... ages. He's a fucking showpony. He has one trick - the feted 'ping'. This season I doubt we've benefitted on iota from that. In fact, I have only ever seen it used effectively and pleasingly just the once - that crossfield ball last season straight into the patch of Baldock. It was world-class stuff. But do we have to endure everything else in his toolbag just to get one fucking pass out of him? Michael Doyle may have been pretty cack at times, but he at least got stuck in and at least left it out on the green stuff most games. See also a raft of middling/shit midfielders like Patterson, Monty, Brian Howard and Stephen Quinn, sometimes they'd feature at 6/10 levels of output. Norwood is painfully short of what is needed at the top level. I hope he moves on, finds a lower level club where his ability and talents will unlock defences and he can do what he wants and is good at, but in the top flight its predictable and he lacks the capability to compete man-to-man in the midfield business. Don't believe me? Look at the goal we shipped vs West Ham at home. Look at the one we shipped at Palace away. Siggurdsson's goal at the Lane. I could go on.

I don't know if it's 'focus' but 'capability' we need. And it's not just him. It's the other two muppets alongside him and that fucking cursed 5-3-2 system (which I am now glad people are using the term 'Wilderball' and '5-3-2' rather than the untruth of 'overlapping centre backs' and 3-5-2)

pommpey

i think if he goes elsewhere his performances will pick up as its a new challenge for him
some people , him being one of them , need a fresh page to be creative
when he joined us he was impressive
but hes just lost his ping

 

[varkanoid]

As expected good read. Agree about George he was getting more pissed off the longer the match went on. Didzy tried his best but he cant create a purse out of a sow's ear. It was as though he was operating at gas mark 10 with his Chicken dinner almost cooked yet those around him were still trying to light a fire. Osbourn tried but when you have endeavour and those around you cant be arsed I really feel for a few of them. Poor Ramsdale too what must he be thinking now of those in front.

Also -1 to pommpey I mentioned the Harlem Globe Trotters analogy weeks ago we are just the team that turns up to make the main team look good.

If this keeps going on end of season there will be those who want to leave to put this all behind them, those they want to get rid of which will then probably leave about 6 players.

Hecky also on the post interview "I've told them they shouldnt feel sorry for themselves in the dressing room". Quite obvious now he didnt want the job. He is just doing a cut and paste of CW in the hope they put him back in the U23's. Any other team in the top half would have sacked him by now if they were in same position.

 

[dublin 10 blade]

I applaud your loyalty and dedication Pommpey
I couldn’t carry on watching ( which for a loyal Blade like myself took some doing ) after halftime
I’d had enough of Stevens , making mistakes , losing his man , not tracking back with his man ,
Is this the guy who wellies in that volley first time last season , being fucking atrocious yet again
Fleck , as the line in Jackie Brown goes , what happened to you man you used to be beautiful, stick to pullin my pint in Barrel after chessie game mate , I know you’ve been injured but stone the fucking crows man your shite this season
Norwood, like what the fuck , Like WTF has happened to you , since the player we all thought we’d had Brighton’s pants down for
Burke , fast as fuck but shit as fuck
Can’t comment on
McBurnie ( let’s hope Swansea go up and take him back )
Moose , let’s Hope McDonald’s calls and take him on
But unfortunately I can see Where your coming from regards Baldock
I’ve said we could lose 4-5 players but injuries to some might put off prospective buyers
I’ve left the worst till last
Lundstram = Cunt , I’d fear for this players safety if fans were in the ground I really do , his commitment to our shirt or lack of it or couldn’t give a fuck about it , are making Hammond look Currie , ok might have taken that a bit to far there , I wouldn’t be surprised if he got a red card with a couple of games to go and
“ missed “ the rest of the season , Just to repay us for his loyalty
Are we playing this team and players until we’re mathematically certain of going down because there seems to be a rottenness spreading through our club that I haven’t seen since our dark days in Division 3 , tail end of Clough - Adkins season
I follow Sheffield United always have always will but I’ve never been so disappointed in our club right now
I’m even missing or not watching games
Even our lass said to me last week are you not watching the game D , can’t be bothered
Her response that’s not like you , you normally have to be dragged away from anything regarding
Sheffield United
That’s how I feel towards these players now , and how there affecting my relationship with our club
Thanks Pommey , it’s the first thing I head for these days I not even arsed even reading Roy’s (excellent) views from anymore
UTB

 

[pommpey]

I applaud your loyalty and dedication Pommpey
I couldn’t carry on watching ( which for a loyal Blade like myself took some doing ) after halftime
I’d had enough of Stevens , making mistakes , losing his man , not tracking back with his man ,
Is this the guy who wellies in that volley first time last season , being fucking atrocious yet again
Fleck , as the line in Jackie Brown goes , what happened to you man you used to be beautiful, stick to pullin my pint in Barrel after chessie game mate , I know you’ve been injured but stone the fucking crows man your shite this season
Norwood, like what the fuck , Like WTF has happened to you , since the player we all thought we’d had Brighton’s pants down for
Burke , fast as fuck but shit as fuck
Can’t comment on
McBurnie ( let’s hope Swansea go up and take him back )
Moose , let’s Hope McDonald’s calls and take him on
But unfortunately I can see Where your coming from regards Baldock
I’ve said we could lose 4-5 players but injuries to some might put off prospective buyers
I’ve left the worst till last
Lundstram = Cunt , I’d fear for this players safety if fans were in the ground I really do , his commitment to our shirt or lack of it or couldn’t give a fuck about it , are making Hammond look Currie , ok might have taken that a bit to far there , I wouldn’t be surprised if he got a red card with a couple of games to go and
“ missed “ the rest of the season , Just to repay us for his loyalty
Are we playing this team and players until we’re mathematically certain of going down because there seems to be a rottenness spreading through our club that I haven’t seen since our dark days in Division 3 , tail end of Clough - Adkins season
I follow Sheffield United always have always will but I’ve never been so disappointed in our club right now
I’m even missing or not watching games
Even our lass said to me last week are you not watching the game D , can’t be bothered
Her response that’s not like you , you normally have to be dragged away from anything regarding
Sheffield United
That’s how I feel towards these players now , and how there affecting my relationship with our club
Thanks Pommey , it’s the first thing I head for these days I not even arsed even reading Roy’s (excellent) views from anymore
UTB

Cheers buddy

Hope the op went well (it was you, was it not?)

pommpey

 

[dublin 10 blade]

Cheers buddy

Hope the op went well (it was you, was it not?

Thanks Pommey
Yeah had operation yesterday ,
Hopefully all turns out well

 

[dublin 10 blade]

Wow you REALLY haven't been here long have you

With that catchy, whistled theme tune, clicky-fingers too?

That's us, that is.

pommpey

I wouldn’t mind but those Stooges got well played , for being as shit as that
Oh wait a minute...,