Investment for CW?

[Tom Bott]

The sticking point is that we want the catering. Apparently it's a no no. Bloody council health rules....

Maybe if the Happy Crab were to employ a Saudi chef this may curry favour with the powers that be..

 

[Boxer Blade]

You've bought five unicorns and they've all gone missing in the post . Of course I don't, you're a "valued customer" .....

10 it was 10,

 

[Sean Thornton]

10 it was 10,

Five, ten. You say potatoes.........

We'll get one out to you today with Vern Logistics. Leave the back door open, tell us where your savings are and we'll put it with them, although unicorns have been known to eat cash and jewellery so we can't be responsible if anything is stol, err is ingested by your new companion.

Your tracking number is the same as your debit card pin, so please use this as a reference in the unlikely event of a query.

Please use the PM system though, there are some right scrotes on here.

 

[Jan Age]

It was left in the green bin.

Tried next door first but there was no answer.

 

[Scooter_mcgavin]

The Prince indeed does have his consortium of very respectable businessmen lined up courtesy of Crab Industries.

There's a reason why Phillip Green hasn't been heard for a while, Vern has a very prolonged 'extraction process' and that involves cash and body parts.

 

[Sean Thornton]

Tried next door first but there was no answer.

Not a wasted journey then. Did you leave your calling card in the cistern? It's company policy.

 

[Blade56]

Ah no signature though was there, its time you were brought to task about this, you cannot keep claiming "its in the green bin" , "the neighbour has it", I bet you think I'm stupid...... dont you.

I received 5 I dint order. Put em on Shpock, flew of the shelf........ Do unicorns fly?

 

[Sean Thornton]

The Prince indeed does have his consortium of very respectable businessmen lined up courtesy of Crab Industries.

There's a reason why Phillip Green hasn't been heard for a while, Vern has a very prolonged 'extraction process' and that involves cash and body parts.

Comments like that will be passed onto our legal team. To suggest links to such unsavoury characters are possibly libellous.

We wouldn't need backers if Fred the Shred has sold us RBS like he was supposed too.

 

[Sean Thornton]

I received 5 I dint order. Put em on Shpock, flew of the shelf........ Do unicorns fly?

Do you want removing from our mailing list? Or do you want to wait until the Chinese midget panda sex dolls are on the market ?

Our research team couldn't find any sales on that website but they did find five on Grnder.....

 

[PaulHalfway]

Well if someone wanted to buy the whole of the club including all land, hotel, acadamy and the money that KM has invested over the years I wonder what this would amount to in total 100 million ????
KM is now 72 and at some point he does need to exit and sell the club on to new owners.
If we need to rebuild the Kop and South Stand any new owner would want to own the freehold and all the land
Plus the new owner would then need funds to increase the wage bill and add better quality players so potentially may need 150 million initial investment, so all very interesting

 

[Darthblade]

We can follow the age old tradition of loaning out our surplus players to local clubs in the lower leagues, for example next season we could loan several players to Sheffield Wednesday

Errr ..... NO !!

I wouldn't piss on those arrogant, deluded, class-less ba**ards if they were on fire .....

Let the scum drown in their own bullshit and f**k them .....

UTB & FTP

 

[Esablade]

Well if someone wanted to buy the whole of the club including all land, hotel, acadamy and the money that KM has invested over the years I wonder what this would amount to in total 100 million ????
KM is now 72 and at some point he does need to exit and sell the club on to new owners.
If we need to rebuild the Kop and South Stand any new owner would want to own the freehold and all the land
Plus the new owner would then need funds to increase the wage bill and add better quality players so potentially may need 150 million initial investment, so all very interesting

Somebody wants to ‘buy all the money KM has invested over the years’ !?

A novel concept, it could catch on!

 

[Darthblade]

As with all matters involving the SUFC Board and any proposed investment ........ having had (far too many) years of experience in these matters ........ I shall use my time honoured plan to avoid my crushing disappointment

I shall commence celebrations when it has actually happened and Tufty is shopping in Sainsburys rather than at Aldi ........

Note ..... I didn't say shopping at Waitrose

UTB & FTP

 

[Boxer Blade]

Do you want removing from our mailing list? Or do you want to wait until the Chinese midget panda sex dolls are on the market ?

Our research team couldn't find any sales on that website but they did find five on Grnder.....

Unicorns aside any idea when the dolls are due in, I know someone who may want one

 

[Sean Thornton]

Unicorns aside any idea when the dolls are due in, I know someone who may want one

April 1st. Tell you what, seeing it's you, pay for three and we'll send you three. Can't say fairer than that. Post free this time.

Is there another address we could deliver to. An elderly relative living alone for instance?

 

[Blade56]

Is there another address we could deliver to. An elderly relative living alone for instance?

In the event of it going to an elderly relative to verify their identification please send their OAP card and PIN number to:

Crab Towers
PO Box 242424
C/O whoever has the keys for the box

Please allow 28 days for the card to be possibly returned.

 

[Boxer Blade]

April 1st. Tell you what, seeing it's you, pay for three and we'll send you three. Can't say fairer than that. Post free this time.

Is there another address we could deliver to. An elderly relative living alone for instance?

Do you mean BOGOF and leave my wife out of it

 

[Sean Thornton]

Do you mean BOGOF and leave my wife out of it

Do I mean BOGOF ?


Lol. Boss, Bob Monkhouse isn't dead ......


Is she the one who buys our Al Bowly eight tracks?

 

[Weasel]

Errr ..... NO !!

I wouldn't piss on those arrogant, deluded, class-less ba**ards if they were on fire .....

Let the scum drown in their own bullshit and f**k them .....

UTB & FTP

Good man. I echo those sentiments.

 

[Jan Age]

Not a wasted journey then. Did you leave your calling card in the cistern? It's company policy.

No I sent a txt via head office to inform them of the green bin... it was either leave it there or collection from the nearest depot which is in Ipswich and only open 11-12.

 

[Fanny magnet]

Some really hilarious shit in this thread
Should keep everyone going till the next series of Miranda

 

[Sean Thornton]

Some really hilarious shit in this thread
Should keep everyone going till the next series of Miranda

The next instalment we go through your previous usernames. Now that will be funny.

 

[Fanny magnet]

The next instalment we go through your previous usernames. Now that will be funny.

Then you could go through the amount of times you've brought it up

You're not allowed more than one account
If you've been banned and open up another account and were to be found out by the mods to have done so you would be instantly banned

But I guess you already knew that

 

[Sean Thornton]

Then you could go through the amount of times you've brought it up

You're not allowed more than one account
If you've been banned and open up another account and were to be found out by the mods to have done so you would be instantly banned

But I guess you already knew that

Lucky you, slipping through the net a couple of times.

 

[BushBlade]

Somebody wants to ‘buy all the money KM has invested over the years’ !?

A novel concept, it could catch on!

Simple analogy. If my car is worth £500 with tax and test and I spend £1,000 getting it taxed and tested, I'm not going to be able to sell it for £1,000.

 

[ShockingBadBuy]

Is she the one who buys our Al Bowly eight tracks?

Well we were heroes then,
And the girls were all pretty
And a uniform was a lucky charm,
Bought you the key to the city
We used to dance the whole night through
While Al Bowlly sang "The Very Thought Of You"
Now Bowlly's in heaven and I'm in limbo now

MUCH better song (and writer) than the rubbish I was quoting you yesterday.