Berge

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BladesOnToast said:
Agreed, there was something a bit neshy about the way he leapt into the air and went to turn his back for one of the goals. I thought they were trained to stay on the ground in the situation and raise a boot to try and block or something
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That neshy behaviour has let him down once or twice this season🤔
Assuming we expect a lad of his stature to be less so.👍
 

The thing with Berge is that the details of his life are quite inconsequential..., where do I begin? His father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. His mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. His father would womanise, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. His childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring he would make meat helmets. When he was insolent, he was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, he received his first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved his testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking - I suggest you try it. Up the Blades ⚔️
 
Kozzy_is_my_Dad said:
The thing with Berge is that the details of his life are quite inconsequential..., where do I begin? His father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. His mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. His father would womanise, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. His childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring he would make meat helmets. When he was insolent, he was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, he received his first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved his testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking - I suggest you try it. Up the Blades ⚔️
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You couldn't make this shit up,could you?
 
Kozzy_is_my_Dad said:
The thing with Berge is that the details of his life are quite inconsequential..., where do I begin? His father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. His mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. His father would womanise, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. His childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring he would make meat helmets. When he was insolent, he was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, he received his first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved his testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking - I suggest you try it. Up the Blades ⚔️
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Im sander berges dad
 
Kozzy_is_my_Dad said:
The thing with Berge is that the details of his life are quite inconsequential..., where do I begin? His father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. His mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. His father would womanise, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. His childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring he would make meat helmets. When he was insolent, he was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, he received his first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved his testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking - I suggest you try it. Up the Blades ⚔️
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PhotoRoom_20230620_205827.jpeg
 
Sell Berge, sign Smallbone, Doyle and OBrien

Easy

Just need to convince someone to pay for him, and convince him to forego next summer's signing on fee despite not even having to play championship football this season

Similar situation to Ndiaye but arguably with even less reason to leave now - because he's already on a proper contract. But he's possibly taking more of a risk because he could easily have a shite season and limit his options

From our point of view, we'll no longer feel pressure to play him every minute for shop window reasons. So he'll have to perform to keep his place. Hopefully anyway.... because it also depends on us having any sort of competition for him
 
Hamandcheese said:
Sell Berge, sign Smallbone, Doyle and OBrien

Easy

Just need to convince someone to pay for him, and convince him to forego next summer's signing on fee despite not even having to play championship football this season

Similar situation to Ndiaye but arguably with even less reason to leave now - because he's already on a proper contract. But he's possibly taking more of a risk because he could easily have a shite season and limit his options

From our point of view, we'll no longer feel pressure to play him every minute for shop window reasons. So he'll have to perform to keep his place. Hopefully anyway.... because it also depends on us having any sort of competition for him
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Your plan is flawless, unless they're both in negotiations over new contracts at united 😏
 

Tezza1889 said:
Your plan is flawless, unless they're both in negotiations over new contracts at united 😏
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I think that ship has sailed

Only possible here I'd say is a mid season renewal for Berge if he's not doing enough to attract better clubs but we're still sufficiently awestruck by his tall Norwegian-ness to offer him something very generous
 
Berge is going to stay on this year unless he gets an offer too good to turn it down and he will most likely stay and then head off

That’s what’s best for him and it’s what illy should do if he has any sense
 
Hamandcheese said:
I think that ship has sailed

Only possible here I'd say is a mid season renewal for Berge if he's not doing enough to attract better clubs but we're still sufficiently awestruck by his tall Norwegian-ness to offer him something very generous
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I’m sure being Norwegian wasn’t the reason Hecky continued playing him after the shop window to sell him closed in Jan

Thankfully Hecky was in the dug out and not yourself because IMO we could be playing pigs next season in the latter scenario
 
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Brownieblade said:
I’m sure being Norwegian wasn’t the reason Hecky continued playing him after the shop window to sell him closed in Jan

Thankfully Hecky was in the dug out and not yourself because IMO we could be playing pigs next season in the latter scenario
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That's an excellent hypothesis - I'm not a football manager so there's a very good chance we would be

I wouldn't say the shop window ever closed - we could have been looking to sell him now as a championship club, with one year left. He did justify his selection post January anyway, in the main. But there have been times when he's not been at it and has stayed on regardless
 
Hamandcheese said:
That's an excellent hypothesis - I'm not a football manager so there's a very good chance we would be

I wouldn't say the shop window ever closed - we could have been looking to sell him now as a championship club, with one year left. He did justify his selection post January anyway, in the main. But there have been times when he's not been at it and has stayed on regardless
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I actually think Hecky has kept Berge on for majority of times because Berge can produce something very few at the club can do, however I do get why others think otherwise and have wanted him subbed, that’s fair enough, just like yourself I’m no Hecky lol

My bug bear with the quite often repeated claims on this site about Berge only being kept on due to his value or trying to keep him in shop window etc, it’s less about Berge and more about Hecky

I get no one intentionally comes on to have a pop at Hecky but basically suggesting ( unintentionally) that Hecky is putting his own job and our results on the line to favour one guys career is bonkers

I think people can fairly question Hecky fondness for the lad but he clearly plays him almost every game because he rates the lad
 
Hamandcheese said:
Sell Berge, sign Smallbone, Doyle and OBrien

Easy

Just need to convince someone to pay for him, and convince him to forego next summer's signing on fee despite not even having to play championship football this season

Similar situation to Ndiaye but arguably with even less reason to leave now - because he's already on a proper contract. But he's possibly taking more of a risk because he could easily have a shite season and limit his options

From our point of view, we'll no longer feel pressure to play him every minute for shop window reasons. So he'll have to perform to keep his place. Hopefully anyway.... because it also depends on us having any sort of competition for him
Click to expand...
With one year of his contract left and our finances, I'm not sure you'd be able to bring in more than one of your listed trio as a replacement.
 
I'd be shocked if someone offered £10 million for Berge. I don't think his future is in the EPL. The pace of it doesn't suit him. I suspect he'll sign a pre-contract for Club Bruges in January.
 
Hamandcheese said:
Sell Berge, sign Smallbone, Doyle and OBrien

Easy

Just need to convince someone to pay for him, and convince him to forego next summer's signing on fee despite not even having to play championship football this season

Similar situation to Ndiaye but arguably with even less reason to leave now - because he's already on a proper contract. But he's possibly taking more of a risk because he could easily have a shite season and limit his options

From our point of view, we'll no longer feel pressure to play him every minute for shop window reasons. So he'll have to perform to keep his place. Hopefully anyway.... because it also depends on us having any sort of competition for him
Click to expand...
I don't hate this as a plan, and I really rate Berge. Ideally, I'd be greedy and have them all.

The real issue here, is lack of any form of longer-term planning. Our two most saleable assets will be off, because they have ambition and this is likely a one year holiday in the Prem for us.

  1. We can't spend now, because the owner doesn't want to fund anything further, so we can't build.
  2. We can't sell these, because we need them be even merely competitive this year. We wouldn't replace them, because of point 1.
  3. We can't entice them to extend, and ensure us a fee next summer, because they likely want to be off and in the easiest of manners, and able to select their destination and bag a signing on fee.
  4. But we can't sort any other squad depth, without a new owner and funds through the door.
We're realistically looking at next season in the champ, without our star players, and without a new owner or any considerable work into squad overhaul or improving squad depth.
 
Kozzy_is_my_Dad said:
I don't hate this as a plan, and I really rate Berge. Ideally, I'd be greedy and have them all.

The real issue here, is lack of any form of longer-term planning. Our two most saleable assets will be off, because they have ambition and this is likely a one year holiday in the Prem for us.

  1. We can't spend now, because the owner doesn't want to fund anything further, so we can't build.
  2. We can't sell these, because we need them be even merely competitive this year. We wouldn't replace them, because of point 1.
  3. We can't entice them to extend, and ensure us a fee next summer, because they likely want to be off and in the easiest of manners, and able to select their destination and bag a signing on fee.
  4. But we can't sort any other squad depth, without a new owner and funds through the door.
We're realistically looking at next season in the champ, without our star players, and without a new owner or any considerable work into squad overhaul or improving squad depth.
Click to expand...
We must sign a new midfield now

Otherwise we'll be in poor shape next pre season
 
Kozzy_is_my_Dad said:
I don't hate this as a plan, and I really rate Berge. Ideally, I'd be greedy and have them all.

The real issue here, is lack of any form of longer-term planning. Our two most saleable assets will be off, because they have ambition and this is likely a one year holiday in the Prem for us.

  1. We can't spend now, because the owner doesn't want to fund anything further, so we can't build.
  2. We can't sell these, because we need them be even merely competitive this year. We wouldn't replace them, because of point 1.
  3. We can't entice them to extend, and ensure us a fee next summer, because they likely want to be off and in the easiest of manners, and able to select their destination and bag a signing on fee.
  4. But we can't sort any other squad depth, without a new owner and funds through the door.
We're realistically looking at next season in the champ, without our star players, and without a new owner or any considerable work into squad overhaul or improving squad depth.
Click to expand...
The window will slam shut again at 11pm on Friday, September 1, 2023

so weve only 71 days left to get players in ....... only 10 weeks

one year holiday my arse

we are here to stay

we got up with 90 plus points with princey at the helm Im pretty sure we can manage, despite our hoardes of doom mongers
 

mattbianco1 said:
The 2 signings of the summer if we can extend their contracts, even by 1 year.

It protects united and both players know, they'll get their move if they perform well in the PL... which both of them will
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They'll recieve a very nice pay increase, and a signing on fee and when they leave, they'll get higher wages at the new club they sign for... Because they're on a higher rate at united after renewing the contract..

2 pay increases and 2 signing on fees respectively, which the agent gets a cut from, so it's very common they extend..

But blades will get a fee when the the player is eventually sold, meaning the extensions were "free" in the end..
 
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