What's your dullest anecdote about meeting a footballer?

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8lade said:
Saw Keith Curle in The Prince of Wales (pub) my Wednesday mate had to point him out to me, nobody could get near him as this chubby girl was telling him what a great athlete she was he looked disinterested. I later saw her outside having a cigarette.
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Thanks for clarifying pub…

Important distinction to make!
 
Are we allowed to use other people's anecdotes?

I used to work with a couple of girls that both claimed to have had numerous go's on Nathaniel Clyne and Morgan Schneiderlin. They frequented some of the trashier bars and clubs in Southampton.

Another girl knew Shane Long and described him as the most arrogant arsehole. I once saw him in a multi storey car park in his Saints training gear. He saw me, knew I recognised him, and looked away with a very smug "I know you know who I am" expression.

Another girl worked a charity event at the St Mary's stadium. Later that evening Fraser Forster sent her a 🍆 emoji on Instagram.
 
Once saw Charlie Cooke, Gary Locke, and Steve Finneston (I think) in Midland station waiting to board a London train, about 30 mins after Blades had beaten Chelsea 2-1 at the Lane....They must have literally got into dressing room, shower in five, swift visit to the bog, changed and out in record time. Charlie was a right smooth looking bastard with his half Pedro moustache. Not sure if he is still with us. Fine player.
 
Hull Blade said:
Once saw Charlie Cooke, Gary Locke, and Steve Finneston (I think) in Midland station waiting to board a London train, about 30 mins after Blades had beaten Chelsea 2-1 at the Lane....They must have literally got into dressing room, shower in five, swift visit to the bog, changed and out in record time. Charlie was a right smooth looking bastard with his half Pedro moustache. Not sure if he is still with us. Fine player.
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Now 80 years old

1689849484348.png
 
Here goes with some dull anecdotes. To make them even duller I've listed them in chronological order:

1. Mates dad used to steward at BL and we used to go to a lot of games free particularly Central League midweek matches (think my mates dad like the idea of getting paid for doing fuck all cos they'd only be about 100 fans there), also meant we got free rein of going wherever we wanted in ground 'access all areas'. Anyway c.1985 we played Liverpool reserves and we hung around outside changing rooms and had our photo took with John Wark.

2. Me and mate progressed to stewarding at BL ourselves while his dad had been promoted to Players Lounge (when it used to be on the South Stand concourse), So c. Dave Bassett era used to frequent players lounge after home games.

3. Trained with the Chippendales. Used to be a gym called Sunny Gym's on Arundel Gate and when they were playing City Hall they came and trained at the gym and one of them asked if he could rotate in with me on the vertical leg press. My max lift was his warm up!!

4. c2004 I was working as a domestic appliance engineer and had a superb run of 'famous people' repairs that included:
  • Turning up to repair Colin Cryan's dishwasher the week after we had lost to Wolves in the play off final. It was early morning and he was sat eating breakfast with Monty. He lived in the new build houses off the Parkway at Catcliffe.
  • Repairing Bobby Mimms washing machine. He lived in the village of Braithwell. He wasn't home, but his wife was lovely. Their washing machine was in a porch with the biggest pile of football boots i've ever seen next to it.
  • Repairing Roisin Murphy's washing machine in her house at Kenwood/Nether Edge. She wasn't there, it was her mother (or mother in law?)
  • Repairing Ray Ashcrofts dishwasher (again Kenwood/Nether Edge). He wasn't there but his daughter was.
  • Repairing Lynne Perrie's dishwasher. She lived with her brother in Maltby. She insisted on giving me a £20 tip even though I suspect she couldn't really afford it. The repair itself was covered under warranty.

4. I've trained/sparred with Cliff Powell at a martial arts gym. I'm tall/athletic build, but he's a man mountain.

5. Found myself stood next to David Holdsworth in the beer garden of the Wheatsheaf in Baslow just after David Weir had been sacked. We were watching our respective kids on the play area when I casually asked 'thrown your name in the hat?' to which he casually replied 'yeah'.

6. c. 2017 Me and daughter queued behind Mark Todd at a Morrison's checkout

7. Earlier this year I was running on the trans-pennine trail and Chris Morgan + wife + dog were walking in opposite direction. We exchanged a nod and an 'alright'
 
St Annington said:
Here goes with some dull anecdotes. To make them even duller I've listed them in chronological order:

1. Mates dad used to steward at BL and we used to go to a lot of games free particularly Central League midweek matches (think my mates dad like the idea of getting paid for doing fuck all cos they'd only be about 100 fans there), also meant we got free rein of going wherever we wanted in ground 'access all areas'. Anyway c.1985 we played Liverpool reserves and we hung around outside changing rooms and had our photo took with John Wark.

2. Me and mate progressed to stewarding at BL ourselves while his dad had been promoted to Players Lounge (when it used to be on the South Stand concourse), So c. Dave Bassett era used to frequent players lounge after home games.

3. Trained with the Chippendales. Used to be a gym called Sunny Gym's on Arundel Gate and when they were playing City Hall they came and trained at the gym and one of them asked if he could rotate in with me on the vertical leg press. My max lift was his warm up!!

4. c2004 I was working as a domestic appliance engineer and had a superb run of 'famous people' repairs that included:
  • Turning up to repair Colin Cryan's dishwasher the week after we had lost to Wolves in the play off final. It was early morning and he was sat eating breakfast with Monty. He lived in the new build houses off the Parkway at Catcliffe.
  • Repairing Bobby Mimms washing machine. He lived in the village of Braithwell. He wasn't home, but his wife was lovely. Their washing machine was in a porch with the biggest pile of football boots i've ever seen next to it.
  • Repairing Roisin Murphy's washing machine in her house at Kenwood/Nether Edge. She wasn't there, it was her mother (or mother in law?)
  • Repairing Ray Ashcrofts dishwasher (again Kenwood/Nether Edge). He wasn't there but his daughter was.
  • Repairing Lynne Perrie's dishwasher. She lived with her brother in Maltby. She insisted on giving me a £20 tip even though I suspect she couldn't really afford it. The repair itself was covered under warranty.

4. I've trained/sparred with Cliff Powell at a martial arts gym. I'm tall/athletic build, but he's a man mountain.

5. Found myself stood next to David Holdsworth in the beer garden of the Wheatsheaf in Baslow just after David Weir had been sacked. We were watching our respective kids on the play area when I casually asked 'thrown your name in the hat?' to which he casually replied 'yeah'.

6. c. 2017 Me and daughter queued behind Mark Todd at a Morrison's checkout

7. Earlier this year I was running on the trans-pennine trail and Chris Morgan + wife + dog were walking in opposite direction. We exchanged a nod and an 'alright'
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I don’t believe you
 
Bumped into former Crystal Palace midfielder Jason Puncheon at Aphrodite Hills golf Resort in Cyprus. Nice chap.
 



Saw Iain Dowie in Tesco at Horwich many moons ago.I realised I recognised him but thought it was someone I worked with so did a second pass. Felt a bit daft when I realised who it was.
 
Nedski said:
Are we allowed to use other people's anecdotes?

I used to work with a couple of girls that both claimed to have had numerous go's on Nathaniel Clyne and Morgan Schneiderlin. They frequented some of the trashier bars and clubs in Southampton.

Another girl knew Shane Long and described him as the most arrogant arsehole. I once saw him in a multi storey car park in his Saints training gear. He saw me, knew I recognised him, and looked away with a very smug "I know you know who I am" expression.

Another girl worked a charity event at the St Mary's stadium. Later that evening Fraser Forster sent her a 🍆 emoji on Instagram.
Click to expand...

Appreciate the tales but they're not in the spirit of the thread. Need to bore them down a bit. These were half juicy.
 
bladeinbolton said:
Saw Iain Dowie in Tesco at Horwich many moons ago.I realised I recognised him but thought it was someone I worked with so did a second pass. Felt a bit daft when I realised who it was.
Click to expand...
I once thought I’d bumped into Iain Dowie too, at Cannon Hall Farm of all random places. But it turned out to be a cow’s udder.
 
Saw some bloke with a training top and shorts with initals DR at a Mcdonalds yesterday. I looked to see if you could buy the tops and shorts and have initals put on, I couldnt find any option. Dunno who it was.
 
biggiesablade said:
Saw some bloke with a training top and shorts with initals DR at a Mcdonalds yesterday. I looked to see if you could buy the tops and shorts and have initals put on, I couldnt find any option. Dunno who it was.
Click to expand...

DR= Doctor... explains the clubs injury list if he was in Mcdonalds
 
Night match @ Lane - heading home up M1 but needed to use the facilities @ Woolley Edge.

Exiting ‘trap 3’ ( or was it 4 ?) I spy Brian Deane entering - not the recently vacated trap 3 (or 4) ,just the general lavatorial environment.

“Alright Deano” I cry thrusting out my right hand in greeting
The great man gives a cursory glance @ my outstretched digits & then a slightly longer gaze over my left shoulder @ the still swinging trap door, a quizzical look on his face.

I immediately understand his reticence surrounding an unhygienic handshake & proffer reassurance by stating -
“don’t fret, I couldn’t manage a dump”

At this point our interaction concluded as we both hurriedly went our separate ways
 
Driving back from my son's football training on Saturday I left room from the car in front at the junction of Rushly Road and Dore Road to allow Anel to cross the road. He did one of those little jogs. He'd been to the Co-Op. My window was down and my son was wearing his Utd kit in the back, I thought about saying/shouting something to/at him, but decided it'd be uncouth.
 



Nah den said:
Driving back from my son's football training on Saturday I left room from the car in front at the junction of Rushly Road and Dore Road to allow Anel to cross the road. He did one of those little jogs. He'd been to the Co-Op. My window was down and my son was wearing his Utd kit in the back, I thought about saying/shouting something to/at him, but decided it'd be uncouth.
Click to expand...
I do like a Co-op 👌
 
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