Monday headline predictions

[PeteBlade]

I'll start....

"Owls humbled at home"
"Sharp Blades cut down Owls"

 

[s4-blade]

Blades Glory, Owls Down.





*monday 7th may that is.

 

[bromtom]

Up the Blades, Fleck the Owls
Fleck wonder goal seals comfortable victory for Wilder's men.

Let's hope anyway.

 

[Ricky]

'83,000 Owls left staggered as lower league nobodies run riot'

 

[Bruce Wayne]

"Miracle flimsy cardboard segregation on Leppings Lane prevented trouble" says police chief Harry Potter.

 

[TCsLoveChild]

Pork sliced by Red hot Blades. UTB

 

[Tyler Durden]

Justice In The 96th

Wednesday defence lose safety certificate in the last kick of the game.

 

[flashinblade1889]

'Pub league team stuns Galacticos'

 

[Geordie Blade]

It depends, really.

If we triumph, expect the Star's main focus to be on Doncaster's win at Plymouth. If the pigs win, it could be anything between a 16 and 128 page special.

 

[Silent Blade]

SUB TUDOR SINKS OWLS

 

[away ends always empty.]

Sundays not good for wednesday.

 

[DifferentClass]

Blades fans reported to SNP equalities commission for singing about John Fleck's 24 inch penis

 

[Ricky]

'Disabled orphans among latest victims of nasty Blades fans'

 

[Filey Blade]

Barbaric blade bites baby and kicks kids kidneys

 

[bladesmanluke]

"Sheffield United fans are a disgrace"

 

[bromtom]

Thousands of Wednesdayites on dialysis after derby day trouble

 

[Tyler Durden]

HORRIBLE UNITED BASTARDS WIN AT BEST STADIUM OUTSIDE PREMIER LEAGUE.

A mate of mine who is a Blade says they were lucky not to lose 9-0

Billy fucking Sharp, who has never won the Rumbelows Cup, scored two jammy goals to inflict a shock defeat against a brilliant Wednesday team in front of a crowd of 110,000.
The game however was marred by several notable incidents involving Blunts fans in which two children (one of which was disabled) were eaten and goalkeeper Kieron Westwood was reportedly struck by a makeshift smoke cannister containing VX nerve gas.




The Star, Monday 25th September 2017.

 

[Ricky]

'Owls icon Tango suffers overdue heart attack'

 

[Ricky]

'Magnificent Owls supporters outnumber Blades at Hillsborough'

 

[Ricky]

'Here are 3 reasons why Sheffield United's 4th goal WAS lucky - agreed?'

 

[Barney]

Owls players feel like they've suffered swift kidney punches after 2-0 defeat

 

[WILLIAM H BONNEY]

Justice In The 96th

Wednesday defence lose safety certificate in the last kick of the game.

Come on tyler your better than that.

 

[LenTednTony]

WEDNESDAY UNLUCKY TO LOSE AT HOME TO LAST 97TH MINUTE GOAL SCORED BY LEON CLARKE.

Final score SWFC 0 - 9 SUFC
Scorers Sharp 2,18, 60 Donaldson 7,19 Fleck 47 Freeman 79 Cooooouuuuuttttsss 84 Clarke 97

Manager CARLOT CAVALIER said "I spoke immediately to Jose Marihno who said it's just an off day amd you were unlucky CARLOT. Those Blades don't know proper football because their team cost less than my wine bill last week.

 

[WILLIAM H BONNEY]

WEDNESDAY UNLUCKY TO LOSE AT HOME TO LAST 97TH MINUTE GOAL SCORED BY LEON CLARKE.

Final score SWFC 0 - 9 SUFC
Scorers Sharp 2,18, 60 Donaldson 7,19 Fleck 47 Freeman 79 Cooooouuuuuttttsss 84 Clarke 97

Manager CARLOT CAVALIER said "I spoke immediately to Jose Marihno who said it's just an off day amd you were unlucky CARLOT. Those Blades don't know proper football because their team cost less than my wine bill last week.

stopped reading after clarke.we all know his passion is to get stuck into a big pie

 

[s4-blade]

Come on tyler your better than that.

You're*

 

[WILLIAM H BONNEY]

You're*

fucking ell spelling police are out tonight.

 

[CHRISSY BLADE]

Come on tyler your better than that.

Fuck off to your own forum you piggy bastard

 

[Sean Thornton]

Every major club in England gutted as the Massives trek to keep the Premier and Champions league completions alive falters yet sgain. Glazers file for bankruptcy.

Trevor Brooking refuses to fellate Sir Dave Richards again although doesn't rule out noshing Tango instead. Just in case.

Wednesdays 5-0 loss at home not as clear a result as it seems writes the Stars Danny 04.

 

[diode_blade]

Every major club in England gutted as the Massives trek to keep the Premier and Champions league completions alive falters yet sgain. Glazers file for bankruptcy.

Trevor Brooking refuses to fellate Sir Dave Richards again although doesn't rule out noshing Tango instead. Just in case.

Wednesdays 5-0 loss at home not as clear a result as it seems writes the Stars Danny 04.

Jean Claude Junkers head of the European Union has ordered an immediate inquiry into the result stating,

"Veee hav no idea howve dis has hoopaned, veee are zending twooops into si area kwown as S2, zer vill beee arrests vor cwimes against vumanity...."

meanwhile in a pub in S2 somewhere 2 celebrating blades watching the news...

"foook me doesn't that dickhead sound like carlotto...."

"ya right about dickhead on both accounts..."

 

[SwissBlade]

HORRIBLE UNITED BASTARDS WIN AT BEST STADIUM OUTSIDE PREMIER LEAGUE.

A mate of mine who is a Blade says they were lucky not to lose 9-0

Billy fucking Sharp, who has never won the Rumbelows Cup, scored two jammy goals to inflict a shock defeat against a brilliant Wednesday team in front of a crowd of 110,000.
The game however was marred by several notable incidents involving Blunts fans in which two children (one of which was disabled) were eaten and goalkeeper Kieron Westwood was reportedly struck by a makeshift smoke cannister containing VX nerve gas.




The Star, Monday 25th September 2017.

Perfect!

I'd still like them to write:

Sharp, famous for "having never done it in the Championship" scored a lucky brace, both from 30 yards