Witty/Humorous Player nicknames

[Fanny magnet]

Argyle fan here on a mission to track down as many of the original witty and humorous player nicknames created by fans both past and present.

Am also interested in any Blades candidate for Psycho/Trigger/Beast and Animal/Tank and the like which so many clubs seem to have.

I guess should also ask if you have any pet names for Wendies players as well although again am seeking the absurd rather than the offensive...although they could be both

Thanks in advance

Peter

No ones ever posted a funny nickname on here

 

[The Original Pedro Verde]

Relish!

 

[gavtheblade]

Michael tonge me and my folks called him "elephant man",and these little beauties too....
Paul Rogers "tomato 'ead"
Michael Brown "bozeye"
Phil Starbuck "bible basher"
Aidy littlejohn "Eddie Murphy"

 

[Sean Thornton]

Michael tonge me and my folks called him "elephant man",and these little beauties too....
Paul Rogers "tomato 'ead"
Michael Brown "bozeye"
Phil Starbuck "bible basher"
Aidy littlejohn "Eddie Murphy"

Digger Barnes

 

[stringjunior]

Bashembauer

 

[corkysbeard]

Gordon ‘sid’ Cowans
Dane ‘sid’ Whitehouse

After his dad?

 

[corkysbeard]

After his dad?

Dane that is...

 

[Keen Blade]

Rhino - David unsworth

 

[Digger]

Not football related but used to work a bloke called James McGuckin, or two dogs as he was known.

 

[HibbyBlade]

Page 4 and nobody's come up with somebody who played for us and his actual name was funny:
Christian Nade, I thought as I'm sure many of us did this was a wind up until he actually appeared. (Christian Aid)

He got the nickname “Fat Eddie Murphy” when he played in Scotland.

Steak Bake was another popular moniker.

Even pundits took to using terms such as “rotund forward Christian Nade” or “chances went a begging for the roly poly striker” etc...

I’m fact, to this day, if you Google him this is the first image Google returns:

He wasn’t too happy about it.

 

[Pollingtonblade]

Monty - traffic cone
Warnock - Colin
Richard Cadette - bag of shit
Alan Wright - useless c**t

Finally more recently

John Fleck - wanker © Maidenhead

 

[Punk Blade]

Back in around 2001 or 2002, during a game I spotted that only one of our outfield players hadn’t scored for us. My dad and I then gave Rob Ullathorne the ironic nickname ‘hattrick Rob’. He kept the name until he left, at which point ‘hattrick Rob’ became Robert Page. We had a number of non-scoring defenders named Rob around that time, amazingly Kozluk scored the most!

The nickname of ‘hattrick’ would stay with a player until he left or broke his duck for the Blades. Sometimes we’d give it to a striker if he didn’t score in his first few appearances (I can’t remember but I really hope we gave it to Cadamarteri!)

 

[Sheff de party]

I can’t be bothered to read through 6 pages to see if anyone’s written it, and he didn’t play for us, but apparently when Kiki Musampa was at City, they all called him Chris.

As in, Christmas Hamper.

I’m a sucker for word play.

 

[bricktop]

Back in around 2001 or 2002, during a game I spotted that only one of our outfield players hadn’t scored for us. My dad and I then gave Rob Ullathorne the ironic nickname ‘hattrick Rob’. He kept the name until he left, at which point ‘hattrick Rob’ became Robert Page. We had a number of non-scoring defenders named Rob around that time, amazingly Kozluk scored the most!

The nickname of ‘hattrick’ would stay with a player until he left or broke his duck for the Blades. Sometimes we’d give it to a striker if he didn’t score in his first few appearances (I can’t remember but I really hope we gave it to Cadamarteri!)

Roger Nilsen was the ultimate hat trick. 150 odd games and never scored although I remember him scoring in a penalty shoot out. Worst thing was that he had a sweet left foot, and I can still remember him hitting some proper long range howitzers, but they would either draw out a top class save, hit the woodwork and narrowly miss.

 

[northsomersetblade]

Let’s not forget captain marvel himself, Bryan robson

 

[I should coco]

I can’t be bothered to read through 6 pages

Thanks mate.

We really do all hang on your every post though.

Oh, and by the way, someone had already written it.......

 

[Sean Thornton]

I can’t be bothered to read through 6 pages to see if anyone’s written it, and he didn’t play for us, but apparently when Kiki Musampa was at City, they all called him Chris.

As in, Christmas Hamper.

I’m a sucker for word play.

Any funny examples?

 

[Sean Thornton]

Let’s not forget captain marvel himself, Bryan robson

Red Wine Robbo.

Turry ( predictive text came up with "Turkey" very true)

Lee Cunt was known to some, for reasons unknown, as "Hendrie".

 

[HodgysBrokenThumb]

An early incarnation of the Higgopotamus was Jack 'Jumbo' Richardson, centre-half in 1949, who apparently never strayed far from his penalty area. More complimentary was 'Smiler' Smith, who made over 300 appearances in goal up to the early 50s. A well-liked person.

 

[HodgysBrokenThumb]

One of my favourite nicknames is that of a player who retired just as I started watching United, and who was the sponge-carrier for several years. He was Harry 'scodger' Latham, and that is the name he was known by. It has only just occurred to me that I have no idea what the word means and why he had that name. He apparently worked as a furnace man, so is it a term from steel-making? I always assumed it referred to the way he played (no nonsense centre- half), but I can't find any meaning of the word which supports that. Its use as a slang word for public schoolboy is no help. Does anyone have an answer?

 

[I should coco]

Jon Matthews was know as 'Trot' by some blokes near us on the Kop, never knew why but it seemed appropriate.

Richard Caddette was known as Space Cadet to us. Sadly not a reflection of his ability to escape the attentions of defenders, just a crap joke.

Jamie Hoyland was occasionally known as 'Northern'.

A certain Wimbledon loanee was known as 'Vaugn Ryan's Express' which was hilarious until we realised he wasn't very quick.

Own Morrision was not-so-affectionately known as 'pig' until he went. Alan Quinn was also initially 'pig' and to avoid any confusion, brother Stephen was briefly known as 'Ginger pig' even though he never played for them.

A laugh a minute with my mates.......

 

[UnitedBlade]

Roger Nilsen was the ultimate hat trick. 150 odd games and never scored although I remember him scoring in a penalty shoot out. Worst thing was that he had a sweet left foot, and I can still remember him hitting some proper long range howitzers, but they would either draw out a top class save, hit the woodwork and narrowly miss.

Marcus Williams must be called Hattrick at every club he’s been at because he’s never scored at any of them.

 

[I should coco]

Marcus Williams must be called Hattrick at every club he’s been at

Or maybe 'wage thief' or 'waste of space'?

 

[The Crab]

And the only nickname I remember Chris Morgan having was The Morganator. Pardon my cynicism when people say Korey isn't a player who feigns injury but Morgan would walk off the pitch with his face rearranged and a yellow card for looking at somebody funny.

I thought I heard someone call Morgan "Manimal"

 

[The Crab]

Roger Nilsen was the ultimate hat trick. 150 odd games and never scored although I remember him scoring in a penalty shoot out. Worst thing was that he had a sweet left foot, and I can still remember him hitting some proper long range howitzers, but they would either draw out a top class save, hit the woodwork and narrowly miss.

I always had a coupe of quid on him because I was convinced he would score at some point.

 

[Sean Thornton]

Or maybe 'wage thief' or 'waste of space'?

Brayfird (originally revered) and James Wallace caught that tag from our more cerebral or Clough hating support.

 

[Pollingtonblade]

Brayfird (originally revered) and James Wallace caught that tag from our more cerebral or Clough hating support.

Wallace had several nicknames, none linked to his football prowess.

 

[The Crab]

Wallace had several nicknames, none linked to his football prowess.

I'll offer "Cudda" as in cudda been a could player if he'd been fit enough?

 

[Pinchy]

They used to call Ted Hemsley "Eddie" Hemsley when he swapped his football shirt for a cricket jumper in the summer. I kid you not.

E.J.O. on the scorecard.

 

[Pinchy]

My uncle called Denis Longhorn, John Holmes. It raised a chuckle the first few times then got on everybody's tits. Didn't stop him though, every time he got the ball.

A short-lived event...