Greenwich Blade
Hitch-Hike General
When it's cold Wheater wears three gloves. One on each hand, and one on his enormous chin.
He's too good for this division; with a chin like that he should be appearing at the London Palladium alongside Bruce Forsyth. How many balls do you think he's burst on the end of it?
He could also get a job here in the Freak Show tent. When I walked past it on my way back to my mum and dad's in Grenoside last night all I could think of was, "Billy Smart, Billy Smart, we've got Billy Smart." Except of course Billy Sharp was the ringmaster yesterday (but not the difference - lion-tamer John Fleck had a hand and a chair in that; oh, and a shoulder).
Rather hilariously the circus was opposite Swillsborough so I asked the guy on the pay desk if I could go into the ring and sing a little song, but he told me to fuck off. Shame, because this would have gone down really well I think:
There's a circus in the town, in the town
Jackie Charlton is the clown, is the clown
And Eric Potts and Roger Wylde too
Are the biggest monkeys in the zoo, zoo, zoo