Garth Crooks

[Tezza1889]

why does anybody care what Garth crookes thinks?

He’s always been dogshit..

 

[CrookesBlade]

No idea why the colour of his skin is being brought into this. There are plenty of shit white pundits across every tv station. How do we account for them?

He’s been around for ever, talks and dresses like a small boy from the 1950s and is probably paid in washers therefore the BBC see him as an easy stand in to call on for bits like Final Score and Football Focus.

 

[alcoblade]

Sad to see a few people melting early (with Garth) above.

 

[Ricky]

Crooks is football's poundland answer to Chris Eubank.

 

[Yoonited]

Yeah fat fingers here mate

Where abouts in NZ are you mate. Was in Wellington 11 years myself. Theres a Porirua Blade on here too.

 

[Akinbiyi]

ET eyed bellend

 

[FlamingLip]

Garth Crooks = cunt. I remember right at the beginning of the 2006 season he said Sheffield United = Not Good Enough. He said it three or four times on Final Score. He never changed his script. Take that Crooks ya wanker.

Was after we missed a pen against Blackburn. Flamboyantly said "Sheffield United, N G E" before the fat smug bastard explained the acronym as if some lyrical genius.

He was and is a total irrelevant annoying as fuck twat.

 

[Niceguyeddie]

He speaks like he is on his 1000th attempt at trying to teach a telegraph pole the alphabet

 

[SUFC Handsworth]

Had the misfortune of seeing and hearing Garth (why say one word when a couple of hundred - of absolute shite - will do) Crooks yesterday afternoon when he was in full anti-Sheff United rant ... I've not sworn at the tv quite as much in years.

So it now feels brill to say up yours Garth Crooks, you've talked nothing but tosh for decades now, keep going with slagging United off this season and we'll give you the big two finger salute at the end of the campaign.

If I was CW I'd play the Crooks diatribe before every game this season, that'll get the team motivated every time.

 

[Greasy Chap Butty]

Wikipedia:
He had spells at West Bromwich Albion and Charlton Athletic before a knee injury forced his retirement in 1990. His career ended on a low note as Charlton were relegated from the First Division, just as the West Bromwich Albion side he had played in four seasons earlier had been.

Loser.

 

[super_pig]

Unfortunately he has the last laugh as we are paying his wages FFS.

After Johnson has sorted out Brexit he should then turn his sights to those bastards at the Biased Broadcasting corporation

amen bro.. i believe the tender for the Tower refurb is out

 

[sufcboy95]

Thought tony Gayle was alright to be fair. Called us a bit in first half but not as much as I was doing

 

[bigbirdblade]

For your perusal.

 

[North East Blade]

I see his wife is on Facebook

 

[KiwiBlabe]

Where abouts in NZ are you mate. Was in Wellington 11 years myself. Theres a Porirua Blade on here too.

Am in Nelson,top if the south. There are another couple of Blades (Blabes) here too. Musical Blade used to be on here was in Auckland and met up with him too.

Love Welly, get iver there whenever i can

 

[Hodgesleftpeg]

In his own head he’s the Aristotle of football journalism.

What actually comes out of his mouth makes him a shit Danny Mills

 

[ShockingBadBuy]

I’m just gutted that tonight I heard Robbie Savage calling Crooks out on Radio 5 for talking rubbish about the Blades.

I mean, Robbie Bastard Savage. The Arch Prince of Wank Puffin. The Crown Cock of Shit Wasp. If that twat has become the voice of football reason, what certainties do we have left to cling to?

 

[FMBlade1]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/49546283

None of our players make team of the week or are even mentioned

 

[Grey Blade]

October 2006, Hunter Davies, in an article entitled "Who ate all the pies" wrote

"Garth Crooks was so light on the pitch, you felt he would blow away. Now he’s all puffed up. As are his long-winded questions"

 

[Jim Chimmerney]

(no title)

Latest fantasy football news and transfer rumours. Get your team updates, match results and upcoming fixtures. Stay ahead of the game plus pictures and videos

www.dreamteamfc.com

Bit of a fight back from elsewhere, good to see

 

[Balham]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/49546283

None of our players make team of the week or are even mentioned

Firmino & Grealish in central midfield with De Bruyne shunted out onto the wing... we've reached peak Garth.

 

[Greasy Chap Butty]

Have a read of this article mattbianco1 has posted.
Looks like Garth is being found out by other people too

Sheffield United= Whac-a-mole !!

Great article here on our style of play... 'a conveyor belt-like system similar to Whac-A-Mole in that just when you think you’ve got one hole plugged, another player pops up.'...

www.s24su.com

 

[Jinxy1966]

In his own head he’s the Aristotle of football journalism.

What actually comes out of his mouth makes him a shit Danny Mills

By the look of the obese bellend he could probably physically shit Danny Mills

 

[Ricky]

I'd love to hear that simpleton try to explain the difference between a 'basic' and 'non basic' style of play.

 

[PokerBlade]

Crooks has been an idiot for years. When he tries to be funny it's cringe, his opinions are always horribly uninformed, and when they let him do interviews he would spend more time rambling incoherently than letting the other person talk.

This is why people watch the likes of Benjamin Bloom. Even though he's a bit irritating with taking twenty minutes to say what could be said in ten, even though he's a complete nobody and a rank amateur, he at least watches a ton of Championship football and knows something about the teams he's talking about. Meanwhile, we keep getting "professionals" saying things like United play 442, or their style of play is "basic" (I'm not even sure what that means but I know it isn't true).

The problem is people will tune in just to see the scores roll in, and it's mostly background TV where occasionally you glance up to see if anything's changed but for every hour it's on you only pay attention to two minutes. Quality of pundit isn't high on the agenda and a bit of controversy gets people talking.

TV is garbage. You can find better by looking for BladesAnalytics on Twitter and a few YouTube vlogs from people who at least attended the game in its entirety.

 

[Scooter_mcgavin]

What I want to know is, what actually IS basic football?

Rigid 4-4-2, hugging touchline, big man little man centre forward? I've absolutely no clue what he's getting at.

 

[PokerBlade]

What I want to know is, what actually IS basic football?

Rigid 4-4-2, hugging touchline, big man little man centre forward? I've absolutely no clue what he's getting at.

Garth Crooks is one of those people that tries to talk in the manner he thinks smart sounds. The problem is his words are missing any of the content.

 

[BushBlade]

Garth Crooks is one of those people that tries to talk in the manner he thinks smart sounds. The problem is his words are missing any of the content.

I think you’re using all the right words but I’m not convinced they’re in the right order.

 

[CopenhagenBlade]

I’m just gutted that tonight I heard Robbie Savage calling Crooks out on Radio 5 for talking rubbish about the Blades.

I mean, Robbie Bastard Savage. The Arch Prince of Wank Puffin. The Crown Cock of Shit Wasp. If that twat has become the voice of football reason, what certainties do we have left to cling to?

I might be in the minority here but I actually quite like Robbie and we have certainly grown on him now that he has actually watched us play...plus he shares the same agent as CW
He can be a bit tiresome with his support of his mates, Clough, Hughes and Bruce but he makes a lot of sense with the majority of his comments.
Following Mills being called out and now Crooks, maybe there will be a trend in calling out shit, lazy punditry?

 

[mcbladeface]

This isn't a defense of Crooks and I maintain that he is an absolute dick drip but I think one of the main problems is the stagnancy of the Premier League. It allows lazy pundits to thrive. For the last umpteen seasons, more often than not, 2 of the relegated teams at the end were newly promoted at the start. Pundits like Crooks don't bother trying to find anything out about new teams because they figure there's no point. Why research a team that's going to go straight back down again? The farthest they'll go is trying to deduce which one will stay up by looking for what they've spent, recognisable names or whatever personal animosity they have toward those teams and then just spout their bollocks from there.

Instead they throw most of their attention and effort on the predictable 'top' teams. That's not to say their insights are any better for those lot but they're probably a little more tactful and careful about pissing any of them off because they see them as the bread and butter and you want to keep them onside. It's only after one of those new teams clocks up a few surprise results that any of them start to actually bother doing homework.

Compare it to the Championship which is famous for its unpredictability. Pretty much every season, there's a set of teams that surprise and almost every pre-season championship prediction ends up being wrong. Pundits for the championship, both pro and amateur, have to put the work in to try and figure out what's going on. there's no room for assumption and shite. It's why they all seem so much better than the crap we now have to listen to.