Bert, The Box Office and Eleven Hundred Quid.

[Darren]

Indeed, SV owned mucho Antmusic. SV was truly gutted when it was announced that the group had split, but then again SV was only young in 1982.

Darren felt the same. He was 15 when they split and was attracted to them by "Dog Eat Dog" and "Kings" etc. However as he got older and wiser he started to appreciate the pre 1980 stuff much more and especially the S&M related stuff (no surprises there).

The song "Dirk Wears White Sox" was never released but is an old demo and contains the immortal (and tasteless) lines:

"You've got to concentrate on camp
In a concentration camp"

Part of the early punk fascination with Nazi imagery (see "Belsen was a Gas", Siouxsie and her swastika armbands etc etc)

 

[bricktop]

[video=youtube;sF1hIaHKANk]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sF1hIaHKANk[/video]

Brownie has had plenty of beef with Walthamstow Blade in the past, but Brownie thinks no matter whatever Walthamstow Blade has done in the past to irk Brownie, nothing has ever upset Brownie more than the image of Susan Boyle that has just appeared on Brownie's computer screen.

Brownie thinks that Walthamstow Blade has ruined this thread in one foul swoop

 

[Bert]

Bert will speak to his memory in due course.

He will also speak to his solicitor regarding the allegation of being a sex tourist. Nothing could be further from the truth.

 

[Darren]

Walthamstow apologises. His ability to read threads has been affected by a heavy schedule of east London sex tourism.

Darren thought that was WB he saw down Club Lick the other night.

 

[JJ Sefton]

Darren thought that was WB he saw down Club Lick the other night.

Walthamstow is barred. He got caught with a rolled up pair of socks down his trousers.

 

[bricktop]

Bert will speak to his memory in due course.

He will also speak to his solicitor regarding the allegation of being a sex tourist. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Brownie thinks that is a solicitor on here, who will be able to give Bert some legal advice at an instant.

 

[SwissBlade]

Swiss thinks that Brownie needs to be careful on this one. Brownie should be able to see the similarity between Boyle and Christa Ackrid. Swiss thinks that SV will be on his way round to "av a word" with Brownie about this.

 

[shorehamview]

Bert will speak to his memory in due course.

He will also speak to his solicitor regarding the allegation of being a sex tourist. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Bert can look at his profile on here if his memory is playing silly buggers. Maybe Bert could also get his solicitor to take our Power Of Attorney too, thus meaning Bert will be able to play fucking hell with one of the nice chaps from Stickleback, Goodyear and Bunsen-Burner when they forget Bert's renewal of season ticket next spring, as Bert will no doubt be too busy spraying Cuban lovelies with Rohypnol and man fat.



Or perhaps not.

 

[FleaPitBlade]

Seeing as this thread has swung around to Susan Boyle, Presty would like to state his utter disgust at the treatment of Sheffield's own Jessica Hobson on last nights Britains Got Talent Semi Final.

 

[Darren]

Brownie thinks that is a solicitor on here, who will be able to give Bert some legal advice at an instant.

But if Brownie reads up the thread he will see that Darren is not macho enough to be Bert's solicitor.

 

[JJ Sefton]

Seeing as this thread has swung around to Susan Boyle, Presty would like to state his utter disgust at the treatment of Sheffield's own Jessica Hobson on last nights Britains Got Talent Semi Final.

They wouldnt let her buy a ticket?

 

[shorehamview]

They wouldnt let her buy a ticket?

Only at full price. She had a proper mardy fit. Knocked Dec out and broke Ant's jaw.

 

[SwissBlade]

They wouldnt let her buy a ticket?

She missed the discount deadline by 2 months because she was Berts cuban sex slave

---------- Post added at 02:32 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:31 PM ----------

Only at full price. She had a proper mardy fit. Knocked Dec out and broke Ant's jaw.

In a Rab Jacket?

 

[JJ Sefton]

She missed the discount deadline by 2 months because she was Berts cuban sex slave

Walthamstow thinks that its posts like this that sent Darrens daughter to Oxford.

 

[shorehamview]

In a Rab Jacket?

In a Jackie Chan stylie.
*EDIT* The Rab Rape Cape.

 

[Darren]

Walthamstow thinks that its posts like this that sent Darrens daughter to Oxford.

Darren wonders if WB is feeling ok this PM. He is making lots of cryptic posts.

WB has still not explained the Ken Clarke one.

Did Darren mention his daughter was at Oxford? It's not something he likes to draw attention to.

 

[Highbury_Blade]

Darren wonders if WB is feeling ok this PM. He is making lots of cryptic posts.

WB has still not explained the Ken Clarke one.

Highbury thinks that Darren should not be encouraging WB in case WB decides to post something more gut-wrenching than Susan Boyle pictures.

 

[JJ Sefton]

Highbury thinks that Darren should not be encouraging WB in case WB decides to post something more gut-wrenching than Susan Boyle pictures.

[video=youtube;5PDuqk_DSMw]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PDuqk_DSMw[/video]

 

[Highbury_Blade]

[video=youtube;5PDuqk_DSMw]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PDuqk_DSMw[/video]

Highbury Blade is thankful that Youtube is blocked at work

 

[Darren]

Darren thinks whatever else Bert has acheived in his life, the fact that he has got Darren, WB, SV, and Swiss Blade to all agree in this thread must count as a major achievement.

 

[raul]

Raul concludes that if only Herbert had thought to have a wager with one of his coves that he could get a double-century the issue of the £125.00 would have been solved in his favour.

 

[JJ Sefton]

Raul concludes that if only Herbert had thought to have a wager with one of his coves that he could get a double-century the issue of the £125.00 would have been solved in his favour.

If Walthamstow had known how easy it was to notch a double century he would have told you all ages ago about the time he got angry in Waterstones because they wouldnt let him have a copy of 'Casino Royale' for the 3 shillings and 6d it cost in 1964.

 

[bramptonblade]

She is indeed one of the more impressive employees of SUFC but she's probably far too busy dealing with all the floods of season ticket purchases to deal with Bert.

She is always available to help with any genuine blade who is in need of proper assistance, send her your details and she will contact you.
Utb !

 

[alcoblade]

Brownie has had plenty of beef with Walthamstow Blade in the past, but Brownie thinks no matter whatever Walthamstow Blade has done in the past to irk Brownie, nothing has ever upset Brownie more than the image of Susan Boyle that has just appeared on Brownie's computer screen.

Brownie thinks that Walthamstow Blade has ruined this thread in one foul swoop

With a week's ban out of the way, alcoblade feels the need to point out to Brownie that he should forget Susan Boyle. Alcoblade feels that Elaine Paige is still worthy of a large portion.

UTB

 

[Darren]

If Walthamstow had known how easy it was to notch a double century he would have told you all ages ago about the time he got angry in Waterstones because they wouldnt let him have a copy of 'Casino Royale' for the 3 shillings and 6d it cost in 1964.

And Darren would have told you about the packet he had to pay for a new straitjacket the other day (shoehorning in another Adam Ant reference there) when in 1923 they only cost 7/6.

 

[Trigger Blade]

Some of you lads have a fair bit of time on your hands these days, some of us still have to do a bit of old school, Bert-style grafting

The regular attention seekers on here must be apoplectic. Bert swans in and notches up a double century without even trying, no poncing about with feeble metaphors and badly written phonetic Sheffieldish.

For those who've been unkind enough to suggest that Trig has an unhealthy interest in Bert. It's much more than that, if Trig had his way, Bert would replace S'ralan or whatever he's called these days on The Apprentice, in fact, he probably ought to be running the country.

 

[JJ Sefton]

Some of you lads have a fair bit of time on your hands these days, some of us still have to do a bit of old school, Bert-style grafting

The regular attention seekers on here must be apoplectic. Bert swans in and notches up a double century without even trying, no poncing about with feeble metaphors and badly written phonetic Sheffieldish.

For those who've been unkind enough to suggest that Trig has an unhealthy interest in Bert. It's much more than that, if Trig had his way, Bert would replace S'ralan or whatever he's called these days on The Apprentice, in fact, he probably ought to be running the country.

Walthamstow thinks Dr Johnson owes Boswell a flagon of mead.

 

[Darren]

Some of you lads have a fair bit of time on your hands these days, some of us still have to do a bit of old school, Bert-style grafting

The regular attention seekers on here must be apoplectic. Bert swans in and notches up a double century without even trying, no poncing about with feeble metaphors and badly written phonetic Sheffieldish.

For those who've been unkind enough to suggest that Trig has an unhealthy interest in Bert. It's much more than that, if Trig had his way, Bert would replace S'ralan or whatever he's called these days on The Apprentice, in fact, he probably ought to be running the country.

Darren wonders whether Trigger is being ironic or if he truly is Sancho Panza to Bert's Don Quixote.

---------- Post added at 04:41 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:41 PM ----------

Walthamstow thinks Dr Johnson owes Boswell a flagon of mead.

Darren thinks that his literary allusion is better than WB's.

 

[shorehamview]

Some of you lads have a fair bit of time on your hands these days, some of us still have to do a bit of old school, Bert-style grafting

The regular attention seekers on here must be apoplectic. Bert swans in and notches up a double century without even trying, no poncing about with feeble metaphors and badly written phonetic Sheffieldish.

For those who've been unkind enough to suggest that Trig has an unhealthy interest in Bert. It's much more than that, if Trig had his way, Bert would replace S'ralan or whatever he's called these days on The Apprentice, in fact, he probably ought to be running the country.

It's got more to do with being off work because it's half-term and some legal nonsense about not leaving seven year olds at home alone. Small Sv and SV have been to the park, had an ice cream, and this afternoon has been Dad's Internet Time.

It's got nowt to do with Bert per se, it just happens that this was the thread that struck lucky. SV agrees that it's been better than the shed thread, but then so is getting bitten by a weasel.

 

[Blade58]

Bert,

can't be arsed to read 12 pages, but have you wrote to everyone's friend Batho, to get his take on things? Perhaps he may be able to sway something in your direction.

I find it remarkable, that in these most troubled times for our club, with less st sales than in recent years, with expected gates lower than in recent years and with less revenue than..................... you know! Why can't this club of ours sort things out and make the right decision?

Unbelievable Jeff!