Respect

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Hard to start tbh but i think anyone that is or has suffered with depression in its many forms first and foremost will find it difficult to explain the actual mechanics of it, the whys and werefores.
years ago i lost my arm in lets call it an accident, some might say a physical disability is reason enough to be depressed but in my case and i'd hazard in quite a few others case's this is not the be all and end all, the root cause of depression.
i personally look around and thank god im not for instance blind, as i find losing a limb far easier to cope with and adapt to than many, many other problems (crazyblade my hat comes off to you for coping so admirably in the face of such adversity)
but i digress, to me who contrary to most peoples belief that suicide is "the easy way out" find the idea of taking my own life unthinkable when others at times would have gladly done it for me, a life i have fought to keep intact and tho i have had many bouts of depression i cannot come to terms with how or why anyone would contemplate such a final insult to the loved ones around you.
depression is as been stated a black hole full of anger, loathing and every other possible negative thought about ones self or in truth the world in general at times and the worst part is people that have no comprehension of the internal mental destruction depression brings saying such meaningless platitudes as "pull yourself together, its not that bad".
let me tell you catagorically (pardon my language) IT FUCKING IS THAT BAD and infinately worse, but to explain why it is i find it impossible to put into coherant words, as for speedo, people are sayin with money, fame etc how could he commit suicide, well tho i personally would never consider it i can understand the logic behind some peoples belief that it is the only way and i wouldnt dare to hazard a guess as to what may have drove such a driven man to such a devastating and horrible end.
if it was a hidden depression then like some on here i can understand it, kinda but i cannot say in truth no matter what his possibly hidden problems were i can agree with how he approached tackling whatever demons he had, but considering how driven he was during his career, anyone not understanding how devastating depression can be should take heed of this semmingly happy, successful and driven man and say there but for the grace of god walk i and be a little more tolerant of other peoples problems.
<soapbox> OFF


MunXy
 



To answer Bergen's question directly - Are we too harsh sometimes?

Read the article and think of Steve Simmonson - or of Stephen (Elpiton) Quinn last season - or of Monty any season - - and think of the comments on this forum - perhaps comments you may have made yourself. If any of these players were to take Speedo's way out - too many on here would have a troubled conscience - or at least they should have.

Too often our level of discussion is unthinking gutter abuse - and whilst people are entitled to their own opinions, events like this emphasise the need for us all to put our opinions over in a considered way - - not just vitriol.


Very sad news
Gary may well have had hidden problems-- real or imaginary, kept from those closest to him. It is difficult to admit that you have a mental ,rather than a physical problem.and then again, do you recognise the problem A broken leg caused by a miss timed tackle receives sympathetic response. Unfortunately It is though there is shame in having a problem in the mind. It seems that so often it is the intelligent perfectionist, skilful in hiding problems that take this final step. There are lessons here for us all RIP Gary
 
To answer Bergen's question directly - Are we too harsh sometimes?

Read the article and think of Steve Simmonson - or of Stephen (Elpiton) Quinn last season - or of Monty any season - - and think of the comments on this forum - perhaps comments you may have made yourself. If any of these players were to take Speedo's way out - too many on here would have a troubled conscience - or at least they should have.

Too often our level of discussion is unthinking gutter abuse - and whilst people are entitled to their own opinions, events like this emphasise the need for us all to put our opinions over in a considered way - - not just vitriol.

It'll never happen because it's human nature to hate people for no good reason and value one life more than another. Whenever someone dies people people only care if it's somebody they like or care about.

If Gary Megson died tomorrow nobody on here would be changing their avatar and there would be a few sick jokes doing the rounds.
 
Thanks for the honesty in your posts guys, it's been a hard but interesting topic to read.

I myself have never suffered from any deep underlying issues with depression, though I have had dark days, about 11 years ago my mums cousin hung herself, she had problems, but problems we all generally struggle with, on the outside she appeared not to worry or suffer with any issues from these problems.
She was afterall a very bright and bubbly person, full of life, the night she died she'd been out with my mum and friends, they all had a good night. My mum dropped her off and then came home, she didn't assume that her goodbye would be the last.
Two days later after not hearing anything from her cousin, she and a family friend went round to her house, they got no response from her, and by chance they tried her phone and heard it from the outside, they broke into her house and subsquently found her hanging in the bedroom. It was a deeply traumatic time for the family. My mum aquired her journal and translated it, (it was wrote in short hand) it told her and their friends of times before when she'd come close to taking her life, and all the pleas for help she'd tried to put out, most had been answered and the things that got to her were able to be cast aside for a short while, but in the end the smallest of things really started to get on top of her and even though friends and family had been there for her nothing eventually could put a rest to her fears, doubts and any other emotions, it had come to a point where she had been overwhelmed.

My partner now suffers from little bouts of depression, the change in her can come quite sudden, she can be as happy as larry one minute and then really down the next. I think having gone through the situation above it's helped me become more understanding of depression and now I try to offer the best support I can give to my partner, it's only the little things like a hug or a kiss, telling her how much I love and care for, in the end I hope it helps, it seems to do.

I'd again like to thank you all for sharing.
 
Great insights, respect and thanks for all who have contributed.

You may or may not have heard one of the final calls on FH last night. A guy rung up and echoed what everyone was saying about Speed the player but then simply said "but what kind of man does that to his family". It knocked Andy Giddins back a bit and he stumbled along saying basically that it wasn't the time for that but not many people have come out and said the same thing (although I'm sure plenty are thinking it).

Whilst those around him are still vehemently denying it, I guess it's not the time or place but it does make you wonder how low someone can be if they end it all knowing they are going to hurt the ones they love the most.
 
Good post chim. I have thought the same as you, and more, on this particular topic. Enough said for now...:(
 
Great insights, respect and thanks for all who have contributed.

You may or may not have heard one of the final calls on FH last night. A guy rung up and echoed what everyone was saying about Speed the player but then simply said "but what kind of man does that to his family". It knocked Andy Giddins back a bit and he stumbled along saying basically that it wasn't the time for that but not many people have come out and said the same thing (although I'm sure plenty are thinking it).

Whilst those around him are still vehemently denying it, I guess it's not the time or place but it does make you wonder how low someone can be if they end it all knowing they are going to hurt the ones they love the most.

Actually, the thinking at that point for most is completely the opposite. Severe depression can actually cause the person to think that they are so useless, worthless, burden-some, full of issues that their family are better off without them. They do actually think in a lot of cases that they are helping by their action.
 
Actually, the thinking at that point for most is completely the opposite. Severe depression can actually cause the person to think that they are so useless, worthless, burden-some, full of issues that their family are better off without them. They do actually think in a lot of cases that they are helping by their action.

Yeah, I appreciate that we're looking from a (relatively !) sane point of view and understand the person concerned may not be thinking rationally so I can see why it would make sense to them.

Reading a few more comments before and Shearer seems to be the 1st one of his close friends to come out and say that if it was depression, 'why didn't he ring me'.
 
Yeah, I appreciate that we're looking from a (relatively !) sane point of view and understand the person concerned may not be thinking rationally so I can see why it would make sense to them.

Reading a few more comments before and Shearer seems to be the 1st one of his close friends to come out and say that if it was depression, 'why didn't he ring me'.

At this stage, when it's nothing but speculation it's hard to say. But if in the end it was indeed depression Shearer, other friends and in particular close family will be asking lots of similar questions. People dying of a physical problem answer most of those questions, people dying of a psychological one just leave more questions.
 
Agent has also said he doesn't think it was depression.

To my mind if it wasn't depression, then it can only either have been a) accidental or b) such a monumental event happened that he felt that he had no choice but to end his life.
 
well whatever it was ,i think it will be a real shame if after such a huge outpouring of grief and touching tributes up and down the country were spoiled by anything untoward

rather not know tbh
 
well whatever it was ,i think it will be a real shame if after such a huge outpouring of grief and touching tributes up and down the country were spoiled by anything untoward

rather not know tbh


Agreed, unless it was a criminal activity
 
Agent has also said he doesn't think it was depression.

To my mind if it wasn't depression, then it can only either have been a) accidental or b) such a monumental event happened that he felt that he had no choice but to end his life.

One point is that on getting his various jobs as a player and manager, GS would have been subject to medical examinations, which would have included full disclosure of his medical records. It seems to be pretty unlikely either United or Wales would have offered him the managerial jobs if they knew he suffered with depression.

Which may only mean that he never went to the doctor with depression, which would have made it all the more difficult to bear.

My hunch is that it was depression,. Compare Speed's demenanour to that of Warnock, Blackwell and Wilson. There always seemed to me a general lowness about him. Ditto Robson incidentally.
 
Lets leave theories of him possibly being abused as a child out of it, eh?
 



To speculate about this is unfair imo, given that its far too soon after the event and that none of us know the facts (probably never will).

Pay tribute by all means but be sensitive. There is a fine line between asking innocent questions and making distasteful comments at a time like this.

I dont personally think anyone on here will have touched on the real reason and I dont wish to discuss why.

Be respectful to his loved ones and leave it be.
 
To speculate about this is unfair imo, given that its far too soon after the event and that none of us know the facts (probably never will).

Pay tribute by all means but be sensitive. There is a fine line between asking innocent questions and making distasteful comments at a time like this.

I dont personally think anyone on here will have touched on the real reason and I dont wish to discuss why.

Be respectful to his loved ones and leave it be.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
 
To speculate about this is unfair imo, given that its far too soon after the event and that none of us know the facts (probably never will).

Pay tribute by all means but be sensitive. There is a fine line between asking innocent questions and making distasteful comments at a time like this.

I dont personally think anyone on here will have touched on the real reason and I dont wish to discuss why.

Be respectful to his loved ones and leave it be.

I think I know what you are getting at and it is a possibility. All should come out at the Inquest.
 
I think I know what you are getting at and it is a possibility. All should come out at the Inquest.

I'm not getting at anything darren and I dont think other people should be either - that was the point of my post.

Just think the public should refrain from speculation at the moment, out of respect for Gary and his loved ones.
 
Well there'll be plenty of time for speculation, the inquest has been adjourned until January.
 
Well there'll be plenty of time for speculation, the inquest has been adjourned until January.

That's the usual practice. Inquests are formally opened and then adjourned so tests and investigations can take place. January is quick!
 

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