United players with unexpected attributes

[Sean Thornton]

Porters ability to make a silk purse* out of a sows ear.

* contains no silk, 100% polyester.

 

[Sean Thornton]

Martyn Woolford finding some effort from deep down to stick the rods up to the fans.

Never happened. It was a heartfelt sarcastic round of applause as he was cheered off!

 

[Sean Thornton]

Mike Lake and his instance on only scoring absolutely amazing goals

Rob Kozluks random pieces of skill (usually in ridiculously dangerous places)

Sun Jiahs utterly mental challenges

Danny Cadamateris ability to hit the post

Leigh Brombys throws

Chris Porters penalties

SJ's challenge down near the Kop John Street corner that saw him red carded was a thing of aerial beauty.

 

[JohnDenver]

Jack Lester's corinthian honesty.

 

[ljk]

Paul Pescisolido was a pretty good novelty half-time goalkeeper.

 

[BushBlade]

Before Don Revie's first match as L**ds manager against the Blades in March 1961, he put Jack Charlton (6 feet 3 inches) up front so that he would win a lot of the balls in the air against Joe Shaw. In that match Shaw was comfortable playing against him because of his excellent anticipation and timing. Jack said of that match "I remember Joe Shaw of Sheffield United laughing at me, I was making such a mess of it. After I protested Don switched me back to centre half"

Paul Parker was also very good in the air for someone who'll never be described as tall.

Matt Hill was surprisingly capable of winning headers too, most of the time.

 

[Champagneblade]

Nathan Blake's ability to be such an ungrateful fecker.

Having taken him from 4th tier to the top table in a single transfer you'd expect a little bit of gratitude but he can't stand us for some reason.

 

[Sean Thornton]

Paul Parker was also very good in the air for someone who'll never be described as tall.

Matt Hill was surprisingly capable of winning headers too, most of the time.

Very good in the air? Spider-Man was brilliant!

Matt Hill had a great leap on him and could time them too. Nice bloke as well.

 

[Sean Thornton]

Nathan Blake's ability to be such an ungrateful fecker.

Having taken him from 4th tier to the top table in a single transfer you'd expect a little bit of gratitude but he can't stand us for some reason.

It's because he's a dick.

 

[flyingmonkeyuk]

SJ's challenge down near the Kop John Street corner that saw him red carded was a thing of aerial beauty.

It was magnificent. He was in the air, like an old Star Wars action figure in a seated pose, for an age, before scything down his opponent.

To be fair to SJ, his footwork was exceptional, he was just mental.

 

[Grappler]

As mentioned on here earlier, one of the biggest surprises in recent years was Neil "yes I know I look like the fat bloke from down the pub" Shipperly. Hardly an athlete, but knew where to be, right place, right time, to pop a goal in (I think one goal every four games on average?), was an old war horse who always had a "been there, done that, know what to do next" look on his face.

Away from football, and due to the sheer versatility of the man, and the number of appearances he makes on the "suggest a shit show" thread, I think the unexpected stage and screen antics of Nick "Monty" Montgomery make him a shoe-in.

 

[Lane Ender]

Basham's occasional skill and nifty footwork.

Very occasional

 

[Lane Ender]

.

Matt Hill was surprisingly capable of winning headers too, most of the time.[/QUOTE]
Any comments Sitwell?

 

[Iffy Onuora's Shiny Head]

Michael Higdon could create the closing theme to EastEnders every time he fell over

 

[Bladesman]

Chris Morgan in the Premier League. Everybody was screaming what a liability he'd be, how he'd be suspended all the time and I thought he was sound to be honest.

He knew what to do with this twat.

 

[CaptainMorgans]

As mentioned on here earlier, one of the biggest surprises in recent years was Neil "yes I know I look like the fat bloke from down the pub" Shipperly. Hardly an athlete, but knew where to be, right place, right time, to pop a goal in (I think one goal every four games on average?), was an old war horse who always had a "been there, done that, know what to do next" look on his face.

Away from football, and due to the sheer versatility of the man, and the number of appearances he makes on the "suggest a shit show" thread, I think the unexpected stage and screen antics of Nick "Monty" Montgomery make him a shoe-in.

My favourite signing of the last 10 years.

 

[Bayingblade]

It was magnificent. He was in the air, like an old Star Wars action figure in a seated pose, for an age, before scything down his opponent.

To be fair to SJ, his footwork was exceptional, he was just mental.

I also remember him making a similar challenge in the kop/south stand corner, against Plymouth if memory serves. He flew through the air, took the ball, the man and about 3 yards of turf before gracefully setting off with the ball down the left wing. The ref did nothing, amazingly!

 

[SouthEssexBlade]

Peter Ndlovu keeping the club shop going, purely on the sales of gloves. Impressive business acumen we never knew he had.

 

[Weasel]

Martyn Woolford finding some effort from deep down to stick the rods up to the fans.

Id be amazed if Woolford is a dad, based on the fact that if he was then it would have needed him to put the effort into getting a hard on, doing the dingle dangle with his bird, before summoning up the extreme effort of doing the tadpole tiptoe up his caber and into his missus. Lazy bstard.

 

[Bergen Blade]

Early days, but I'll add Ndiaye's ability to press and get a foot on the ball in challenges.

McBurnie's ability to win headers in his own box. His general aerial ability is good, but he seems to win everything in our box, yet don't too often get on the end of crosses in the opposition's box.

Berge's pace on the ball.

Sharp got another assist with a cross yesterday.


Couple of unexpected weak attributes:

Berge's heading

Basham's throw ins. Big lad, long arms, takes a lot of them, but can't seem to get much length on them.

 

[Lendegoeystash]

Billy Tightshirts’s ability to make opposing centre halfs suddenly develop pulled hamstrings and calf strains.