Twitter Says Gary Hoopers is in talks

[Gin&Juice]

Is it true???? Stranger things have happened.. Remember when Luke Davennport signed for midtable Harchester United from Barcelona for 28 Million? Apologies for the reference but the storyline is from the popular tv series Dream Team in which "farfetched" storylines featured prominently to a midlands Football club. Honestly no irony

 

[Reedy1889]

Nothing to see here, just one of many complete nonsense rumours banded about this summer. Although it's hilarious seeing some folk on Twitter believing this

 

[Gin&Juice]

Nothing to see here, just one of many complete nonsense rumours banded about this summer. Although it's hilarious seeing some folk on Twitter believing this

Buh buh buhhhhh he played for Adkins one time

 

[maxstertheblade]

Is it true???? Stranger things have happened.. Remember when Luke Davennport signed for midtable Harchester United from Barcelona for 28 Million? Apologies for the reference but the storyline is from the popular tv series Dream Team in which "farfetched" storylines featured prominently to a midlands Football club. Honestly no irony

Can't aww the image

 

[Torrix1889]

Is it true???? Stranger things have happened.. Remember when Luke Davennport signed for midtable Harchester United from Barcelona for 28 Million? Apologies for the reference but the storyline is from the popular tv series Dream Team in which "farfetched" storylines featured prominently to a midlands Football club. Honestly no irony

Cue instant erection for maxster....

 

[Gin&Juice]

Cue instant erection for maxster....

Give it 5 years. He'll soon realise that Warnock was the best manager of his generation

 

[Pinchy]

Cue instant erection for maxster....

Not sure he's at that stage, yet....

 

[Blade58]

No chance imho. He's not quite ready for league 1 I suspect

I guess he'll have the chance to join a number of championship clubs and I would suspect even the pigs will be interested if webuyanycarvalhal actually knows who he is

 

[Bladesman]

Good rumour that one. Surely we should be looking at signing Messi though?

 

[SouthEssexBlade]

As a regular on here frequently posts, if this happens I'll bear my arse on the town hall steps.

 

[Pierre's PC]

What does Magic Mike say?

 

[Guesty]

Keith Edwards loved Gary Hooper before it was cool.

 

[Darthblade]

As a regular on here frequently posts, if this happens I'll bear my arse on the town hall steps.

I'm more likely to get a raunchy threesome with Kelly Brooke & Scarlet Johannsen than we are to sign Hooper, however, I'm prepared to foregoe that once in a lifetime pleasure for the benefit of the team if the "Football Gods" are listening in ......

Don't all thank me at once guys ...... I'll be the one celebrating with all the rest of you in May, but with just a slight hint of "I did make the right decision didn't I " written all over my face
UTB & FTP

 

[itsinyerblood]

As a regular on here frequently posts, if this happens I'll bear my arse on the town hall steps.

SEB, could I request that you inform me of the time and date of your arse-bearing should United sign Hooper? I'll make sure that the cultural significance of your act of contrition is forever captured on camera and video, and acts as a lesson for future sceptics. Will you be au naturel, or will the aforementioned arse have been bleached or whatever the current fashion for this sort of thing is? I seem to recall you mentioning you're a hairy bugger, so just wondering like.

 

[SouthEssexBlade]

SEB, could I request that you inform me of the time and date of your arse-bearing should United sign Hooper? I'll make sure that the cultural significance of your act of contrition is forever captured on camera and video, and acts as a lesson for future sceptics. Will you be au naturel, or will the aforementioned arse have been bleached or whatever the current fashion for this sort of thing is? I seem to recall you mentioning you're a hairy bugger, so just wondering like.

 

[itsinyerblood]

As camouflage goes that's stunning.....it's like one of the outtakes from Kubrick's '2001'.....makes the signing of Hooper suddenly acquire a new importance.

 

[Latters]

Why would people be so excited at the prospect of Hooper but disappointed by Billy? They're essentially the same player, albeit Billy didn't have a spell in The Land Where Anthony Stokes Shone to falsely inflate his statistics.

 

[Blade56]

I think he's got pollysistic ovarys

 

[SouthEssexBlade]

I think he's got pollysistic ovarys

Avian issue, normally found in the Psittaciformes genus?

 

[Barney]

Why would people be so excited at the prospect of Hooper but disappointed by Billy? They're essentially the same player, albeit Billy didn't have a spell in The Land Where Anthony Stokes Shone to falsely inflate his statistics.

Look at the respective clubs each player has played for in recent years and you'll have your answer.

 

[SouthEssexBlade]

Look at the respective clubs each player has played for in recent years and you'll have your answer.

Never mind the clubs played for, look at goal scoring records over the last 4 years.

 

[Barney]

Never mind the clubs played for, look at goal scoring records over the last 4 years.

Since 2008:

Sharp
Played: 244
Goals: 78
Goals per game: 0.32

Hooper
Played: 236
Goals: 124
Goals per game: 0.53

Although it's pointless as Hooper won't be signing for us, he is quite clearly miles ahead of Sharp. The only statistics letting him down are the ones since signing for Norwich and that's obviously because the whole club struggled in the Prem. If he didn't sign for them I suspect those figures would be much higher still.

 

[Jehovah]

Look at the respective clubs each player has played for in recent years and you'll have your answer.

Indeed, Hooper has never been deemed good enough to grace the turf at bramall lane, unlike Sharp.

 

[vorpal blade]

dear me, what a ridiculous settee

 

[Pinchy]

Indeed, Hooper has never been deemed good enough to grace the turf at bramall lane, unlike Sharp.

...until he actually did - then we had to think again...

He wasn't assisted, to be fair, by the "quality" of management!

 

[Pinchy]

Since 2008:

Sharp
Played: 244
Goals: 78
Goals per game: 0.32

Hooper
Played: 236
Goals: 124
Goals per game: 0.53

Although it's pointless as Hooper won't be signing for us, he is quite clearly miles ahead of Sharp. The only statistics letting him down are the ones since signing for Norwich and that's obviously because the whole club struggled in the Prem. If he didn't sign for them I suspect those figures would be much higher still.

Both players, it ought to be said, have far better records than the likes of Jonny Bladey Steady, Nicky Bladey Blackman, Craig Mediocre Davies and many many others who are regularly and routinely recommended on here...

 

[Jon Bon]

Who are the Gary Hoopers? Did they climb both peaks of Kilimanjaro..?

 

[Barney]

Does anyone have links to these twitter posts please?

 

[shorehamview]

Who are the Gary Hoopers? Did they climb both peaks of Kilimanjaro..?

This thread is sponsored by Andy Townsend & Co, proud manufacturers of the "PluraliseEverything-A-Tron".

 

[vorpal blade]

Yous lot should respect the shorehamviews of this world