Balham Blade
S24SU Seer
Well, that was a thoroughly shit evening. Got to the ground 5 minutes after kick off only to find out that our tickets were stuck on the M4. Faced with a decision between standing around and paying again, we paid again. That was a mistake.
The game
Dire. Two sides devoid of pace, trickery or composure hoofing the ball from defence to defence. It was "Blackwellian", to borrow Ollessendro 's phrase.
Every now and then, we'd put a couple of passes together in midfield but the ball would then end up at the feet of Hill who'd launch it or McMahon, who'd...well, launch it.
One half decent Swindon move saw them hit the post with a deflected effort, Long had one routine stop to make down to his left while at the other end we had one soft shot from Blackman in the first half and two blocked efforts from a McMahon free kick near the end of the 90.
Paolo watch
Mad as a can of frogs. Spent more time arguing with his own players than the referee which I was a little surprised by.
United
Long: did the basics well, came and claimed one looping cross out past his penalty spot. Swindon were targeting him under high crosses and he dealt with all but one (a bad punch) well. Good to see a United keeper rolling the ball out to his full backs but his kicking needs work - he seemed to slice a lot of clearances. 7
McMahon: solid in defence and good free kicks at the end but he's so unambitious it's painful. Lofted balls down the flanks to no-one or hoofed crossfield balls. Booked for twice trying to take a Swindon throw. 6
Maguire: dealt very will with their no 9 who spent more time jumping at Maguire or wrestling with him than trying to play the ball. Yes, Maguire hits too many long balls but that's probably because there's next to no movement in front of him. 7
Collins: less steady than his young defensive colleague - he needs some heading practice to stop him putting clearing headers at the feet of opposition central midfielders. A good effort blocked at the end though. 6
Hill: as good as Hill was at Orient he was poor here. His weaknesses are painfully exposed at left back and having Williams in front of him didn't help. Woeful distribution capped a bad night. 4
Flynn: peripheral for most of the game, a fact not aided by McMahon's tendency to hoof the ball 3 feet over Flynn's head. Some good skill near the end of the game saw him get past the left back a couple of times but the resulting crosses were disappointing. Didn't deserve the flack he got from the sidelines, however. 6
Doyle: I don't think I saw Doyle do much other than play a few safe 5 yard balls. Football has moved on and players like Doyle are outdated. On the bright side, he kept his studs to himself for once. 4
McDonald: the only player who put his foot on the ball and got his head up but he can't do it all himself. Some lovely passes but too often their central midfielders were ahead of him: he still needs to sharpen up on his defensive positioning. Oh, and his heading is dreadful for someone so tall. 6
Williams: it's not Marcus Williams' fault that he was played out of position on the left wing but I still expect a bit of footballing intelligence from a professional: knowing when to drop short, when to pull wide etc. Oh, the ability to control a football would be nice too. Two other points: he was chopped down in the first half by a late, high tackle which could have seen the Swindon player sent off and he managed to beat three men down the wing in the second half...before shinning the ball straight out. 2
Porter: I've seen Porter play a few times now and have a rough idea of what his game involves. He's good in the air but that was nullified by the Swindon centre halves; his first touch is not good but he can show flashes of skill. The weaknesses were highlighted yesterday by the tactics and Blackman's positioning (more on that below); he had no opportunity to show off his strengths. Isolated up front, it was all too easy for the Swindon defence. 4
Blackman: really, really disappointing. His positioning is absolutely terrible: he's constantly 10 yards further away from the ball than he should be. We know that Porter is good in the air - Blackman should be looking for the flick ons or knock downs but he was always too far away from his strike partner. This meant that Porter was having to try and aim his headers rather than just win the ball. One snap-shot in the first half was about as much as we saw from Blackman in an attacking sense. 3
Sub:
Cresswell: (for Blackman, around 70 mins): did the usual Cresswell thing; ran around looking laboured. Think he touched the ball about three times. n/a
Wilson's tactics
I could go on about this for pages but I won't. Suffice to say that picking Williams at left wing summed up Danny's approach - don't concede and you won't lose. Fine, but we were playing Swindon Town in the third tier. The icing on this particularly shit cake was Blackman being replaced by Cresswell in our only substitution. 1/10 (and I'm still sure he's the right man for the job)
United fans:
814 Blades in good voice. Responding to a Swindon chant of "this game's too big for you" aimed at the ref with "your ground's too big for you"; labelling Swindon as "just a bus stop in Oxford"; hurling abuse at Di Canio - all while a terrible game was being played. Kudos to the blokes who smuggled a 15 foot banner with "Di Canio: Porco Facsisto" on it too.
Referee:
I thought the referee had an excellent game, refusing to listen to the increasingly hysterical reaction of the Swindon fans whenever a decision went against their team. The tackle on Williams was shocking but he erred on the side of caution in just booking him: probably the right call given that it was the first bad tackle in the game.
The game
Dire. Two sides devoid of pace, trickery or composure hoofing the ball from defence to defence. It was "Blackwellian", to borrow Ollessendro 's phrase.
Every now and then, we'd put a couple of passes together in midfield but the ball would then end up at the feet of Hill who'd launch it or McMahon, who'd...well, launch it.
One half decent Swindon move saw them hit the post with a deflected effort, Long had one routine stop to make down to his left while at the other end we had one soft shot from Blackman in the first half and two blocked efforts from a McMahon free kick near the end of the 90.
Paolo watch
Mad as a can of frogs. Spent more time arguing with his own players than the referee which I was a little surprised by.
United
Long: did the basics well, came and claimed one looping cross out past his penalty spot. Swindon were targeting him under high crosses and he dealt with all but one (a bad punch) well. Good to see a United keeper rolling the ball out to his full backs but his kicking needs work - he seemed to slice a lot of clearances. 7
McMahon: solid in defence and good free kicks at the end but he's so unambitious it's painful. Lofted balls down the flanks to no-one or hoofed crossfield balls. Booked for twice trying to take a Swindon throw. 6
Maguire: dealt very will with their no 9 who spent more time jumping at Maguire or wrestling with him than trying to play the ball. Yes, Maguire hits too many long balls but that's probably because there's next to no movement in front of him. 7
Collins: less steady than his young defensive colleague - he needs some heading practice to stop him putting clearing headers at the feet of opposition central midfielders. A good effort blocked at the end though. 6
Hill: as good as Hill was at Orient he was poor here. His weaknesses are painfully exposed at left back and having Williams in front of him didn't help. Woeful distribution capped a bad night. 4
Flynn: peripheral for most of the game, a fact not aided by McMahon's tendency to hoof the ball 3 feet over Flynn's head. Some good skill near the end of the game saw him get past the left back a couple of times but the resulting crosses were disappointing. Didn't deserve the flack he got from the sidelines, however. 6
Doyle: I don't think I saw Doyle do much other than play a few safe 5 yard balls. Football has moved on and players like Doyle are outdated. On the bright side, he kept his studs to himself for once. 4
McDonald: the only player who put his foot on the ball and got his head up but he can't do it all himself. Some lovely passes but too often their central midfielders were ahead of him: he still needs to sharpen up on his defensive positioning. Oh, and his heading is dreadful for someone so tall. 6
Williams: it's not Marcus Williams' fault that he was played out of position on the left wing but I still expect a bit of footballing intelligence from a professional: knowing when to drop short, when to pull wide etc. Oh, the ability to control a football would be nice too. Two other points: he was chopped down in the first half by a late, high tackle which could have seen the Swindon player sent off and he managed to beat three men down the wing in the second half...before shinning the ball straight out. 2
Porter: I've seen Porter play a few times now and have a rough idea of what his game involves. He's good in the air but that was nullified by the Swindon centre halves; his first touch is not good but he can show flashes of skill. The weaknesses were highlighted yesterday by the tactics and Blackman's positioning (more on that below); he had no opportunity to show off his strengths. Isolated up front, it was all too easy for the Swindon defence. 4
Blackman: really, really disappointing. His positioning is absolutely terrible: he's constantly 10 yards further away from the ball than he should be. We know that Porter is good in the air - Blackman should be looking for the flick ons or knock downs but he was always too far away from his strike partner. This meant that Porter was having to try and aim his headers rather than just win the ball. One snap-shot in the first half was about as much as we saw from Blackman in an attacking sense. 3
Sub:
Cresswell: (for Blackman, around 70 mins): did the usual Cresswell thing; ran around looking laboured. Think he touched the ball about three times. n/a
Wilson's tactics
I could go on about this for pages but I won't. Suffice to say that picking Williams at left wing summed up Danny's approach - don't concede and you won't lose. Fine, but we were playing Swindon Town in the third tier. The icing on this particularly shit cake was Blackman being replaced by Cresswell in our only substitution. 1/10 (and I'm still sure he's the right man for the job)
United fans:
814 Blades in good voice. Responding to a Swindon chant of "this game's too big for you" aimed at the ref with "your ground's too big for you"; labelling Swindon as "just a bus stop in Oxford"; hurling abuse at Di Canio - all while a terrible game was being played. Kudos to the blokes who smuggled a 15 foot banner with "Di Canio: Porco Facsisto" on it too.
Referee:
I thought the referee had an excellent game, refusing to listen to the increasingly hysterical reaction of the Swindon fans whenever a decision went against their team. The tackle on Williams was shocking but he erred on the side of caution in just booking him: probably the right call given that it was the first bad tackle in the game.
.. credit where it's due and all that 
