Shoreham Boys - PC version ideas!?

[Peezablade]

Whoever resurrected this brilliant 1970s Kop favourite gets a pat on the back. It was sung last season at various grounds but has really been taken to heart this season. Thinking of being part of 6000 Blades blasting it out at Villa Park will always raise the hairs on the back of my neck. However.....

There is a definite lull in the volume level when we sing the bit about adoring our females. Fathers won't sing it in front of their kids; kids won't sing it in front of their parents (or maybe they don't know or understand the words); women can't sing it at all.

So, any suggestions for a 21st Century PC line? It doesn't have to rhyme with owt cause that gets covered by here & beer.
My suggestion, short term only and following a current trend, is 'grow a beard'.

And yours?

 

[blade too long]

Why do we have to sing about a police constable ?

 

[blade too long]

or is it a personal computer

 

[Trigger Blade]

or is it a personal computer

That reminds me of the line in Life on Mars where John Simm is transported back to the 70s in police station where he worked. He looks at his computer-free desk and says to the assembled room full of coppers "Where's my PC terminal?" and they say "Who?"

 

[Rusty view]

We love our football and we'll drink your beer. Simples.

 

[blade too long]

Shoreham boys we are here whoa ho
we respect your women folk and would love to sample your local breweries offerings, if thats ok with you whoa ho

has a few scanning issues

 

[shorehamview]

So, any suggestions for a 21st Century PC line?

Shoreham Boys we are here,
Engage your ladies in witty and amusing conversation and drink your beer!

Doesn't quite have the same ring to it. What will we be changing so it doesn't offend next?

You fill up my senses,
Like a bottle of shandy, that really weak sort that you get from a newsagent,
Like a Nicorette patch,
Like a good menthol inhalant.

Like a night in watching one of those rather stimulating talent shows that ITV is so fond of,
Like a low-fat hummus and tofu wrap,
Like Sheffield United,
Come fill me again!

Na na na na naaaa na, hip hip hurrah!



Or perhaps this one -

If I had the wings of a sparrow,
Or the cloaca of a Corvus Corone.
I'd fly over Hillsborough tomorrow,
And wave at them as a modern cross-breeding miracle.


We already have a Politically Correct area for those offended by raucous chaps singing rude songs. It's called "staying at home".

 

[blade too long]

CONVUS CORONE , is that served with spaghetti or tagliatelli

 

[Rollerball]

Shoreham boys and girls and those of indeterminate sex or sexual orientation whoa whoa
Shoreham boys and girls and those of indeterminate sex or sexual orientation whoa whoa
Indulge in you varied and wide spread sexual activities depending on your orientation and drink whatever tipple takes your fancy
Whoa whoaaaaaaaa

It's a song Ffs , it's not racist, religious or any such PC bollox, give it a rest

 

[SwissBlade]

I think much of it is also inaudible due to people not really being able to get their timing right.

So what we need is Gary Barlow in a slightly too tight Blades shirt sitting at a piano by the penalty spot of the kop. He can lead us in with his "chart topping, used to be fat and shit, but now he's had elocution lessons, slimmed down and writes songs for films and charities" type way. The than Gareth bloke that 'did' the military wives can orchestrate.

We probably need an x-factor style contest to determine the best singers at the club and someone with a story so that they can have their ugly mug on the big screen stating what a journey they've been on

 

[blade too long]

we need this man , urgently

rows E TO F BARITONES
rows G TO H CONTRATOS
row I TO K SOPRANOS
row L TO R FALSETTOS

 

[Northyorksblade]

Our Jack wants to sing it, so his gran suggested kiss, to a withering look from Jack, but he does now sing that. There are some Blades songs that he has to miss out more words than he actually sings!

 

[pommpey]

"You're going to befall some cranial trauma
You're going to befall some cranial trauma"

"We dislike clubs from other regions of Yorkshire, and
Clubs from other regions of Yorkshire, and
Clubs from other regions of Yorkshire, and
Clubs from other regions of Yorkshire

Clubs from other regions of Yorkshire, and
Clubs from other regions of Yorkshire, and
Clubs from other regions of Yorkshire, and
Clubs from other regions of Yorkshire

We collectively emphasise strongly how we dislike
Clubs from other regions of Yorkshire"

"My father suggested I support another team from Sheffield,
I disagreed, and put to him that he should fornicate elsewhere as
What he was saying was irrational and in doing so
He made himself physically akin to a female reproductive part."

"Sheffield Wednesday Fucked It Up Again!"

(sorry. there is no alternate lyrics to the last one)

"Shoreham Boys, we are here, woh-ho, who-ho
Shoreham Boys, we are here, woh-ho, who-ho
Shoreham Boys, we are here
Sheffield Wednesday Fucked It Up Again
Woh-ho, ho, woh-ho, ho, woh-ho."

It needs some work, but not much.

pommpey

 

[bricktop]

My young un thinks it goes

Shoreham Boys, we are here, Kiss your women and drink your beer,

 

[Blackheath Blade]

Shoreham Boys, we are here, woh-ho, who-ho
Shoreham Boys, we are here, woh-ho, who-ho
Shoreham Boys, we are here

We've won fuck all in seventy years,

Whoao whoao ooo

 

[Rollerball]

"You're going to befall some cranial trauma
You're going to befall some cranial trauma"b

"Sheffield Wednesday Fucked It Up Again!"
(sorry. there is no alternate lyrics to the last one)
pommpey

How about "Sheffield Wednesday failed to live up to their reputation as the worlds best football team again, thus proving once more they are not quite as massive as once portrayed by their huge(?) fan base"

And of course the one that rings out around all grounds or did " who is the person dressed in black, tho could be in several other colours including green, yellow and blue who's lineage may be questionable with the suggestion he may have been born beyond the holy house of wedlock"

"You're playing with a certain resemblance to excrement and we believe this fact has not gone unnoticed amongst your selves and your followers" repeat as deemed necessary

 

[billyblademan]

Eat your pies, drink your beer

 

[essex blade]

the clubs official version !!!

 

[SwissBlade]

View attachment 7808 the clubs official version !!!

What a load of shite!

 

[Damski]

OH SHEFFIELD (OH SHEFFIELD)
IS WONDERFUL (IS WONDERFUL)
OH SHEFFIELD IS WONDERFUL, IT'S FULL OF lovely, attractive, intelligent women, who are not subject to any objectification on our part and are treated as equals.

 

[Rufus Smalls]

View attachment 7806
we need this man , urgently

rows E TO F BARITONES
rows G TO H CONTRATOS
row I TO K SOPRANOS
row L TO R FALSETTOS

A dangerous set up BTL .... rows I to K will have shot each other by half-time.

 

[PeterNdlovu081]

PC version?

SHOREHAM BOYS WE ARE
WE'LL CRASH YOUR BROWSERS
EAT YOUR DATA

 

[Lt. J Dangle]

Does anyone remember the Lazio fans welcome to Gazza with the banner,
"Shake your women, drink your beer"
Which wasn't any better, to be honest.

 

[pommpey]

OH SHEFFIELD (OH SHEFFIELD)
IS WONDERFUL (IS WONDERFUL)
OH SHEFFIELD IS WONDERFUL, IT'S FULL OF lovely, attractive, intelligent women, who are not subject to any objectification on our part and are treated as equals.

The last line should read:

"Part of the attraction to uphold our claim is that breasts and vaginas are also of abundant quality
Alongside a football team from the southern end of the city who play in red and white

QED: That is why we attest Sheffield is wonderful"

"Oh, we are not particularly financially awash with surplus funds to note
However we are blessed to have a decent quality of playing staff who including a robust winger called Alan Woodward and skilful, flamboyant playmaker and goalscorer called Tony Currie
Underpinning that fortune, we have a noteworthy, no-questions-asked central defender called Eddie Colquhoun
And we are confident this combination will bring success with regard our ambitions.

Would everyone present mind chorusing this last quadret, and reinforcing these facts for our opposition supporters please?"

by the way -

"You may be returning to your place of your origin, courtesy of an emergency vehicle."

pommpey

 

[FleaPitBlade]

I was walking down shoreham street swinging a chain
Walked up to a Wednesday fan, asked him his name
My fist inadvertidly made contact with his cranium and testicular region in an manner of unfortunate accident,
Now that supporter of Sheffield Wednesday is deceased.

 

[pommpey]

"My daily sojourn happened me across the delightful neighbourhood adjoining the home supporters end of Bramall Lane, home of Sheffield United FC, and thus was moved to break out into choral serenade
Also on this thoroughfare journeyed a brace of supporters from our arch rivals, Sheffield Wednesday
Verily, such is our enmity, I instantly offered brutal and uncharacteristic violence upon the pair
My well-aimed shots scored multiple direct hits in the genital and facial areas on both victims, if only to persuade them that not only were they showing supreme stupidity locating themselves in this vicinity, but they were also wholly misguided in their loyalty to such an ignominious footballing outfit
I hasten to report that their outcome was not pleasant or enduring."

pommpey

 

[yuley82]

Shoreham Boys, we are here, woh-ho, who-ho
Shoreham Boys, we are here, woh-ho, who-ho
Shoreham Boys, we are here

We've won fuck all in seventy years,

Whoao whoao ooo

Apart from a silver plate on promotion to the prem?!

 

[WhiteHawk]

I don't actually like this song. I'm no prude at all but there's just something not right about the 'shag your women' line, it's got absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with football/being a Blade.

You can never make that line out anyway, I think most people either mumble it or don't bother singing it.

 

[PeterNdlovu081]

Shoreham Boys, we are here, woh-ho, who-ho
Shoreham Boys, we are here, woh-ho, who-ho
Shoreham Boys, we are here

We've won fuck all in seventy years,

Whoao whoao ooo

You've only got until 17th of May to sing this though.