Match Report from a Chesterfield

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Good report, but a journalism student starting paragraphs with , and, but and however?

Whatever happened to the English language :-)
 
Excellent report. Keep turning out stuff like that and you will do well in your chosen career.

Read pretty well, and was concise and to the point, as well as picking up on all the key moments.
 
Maidenhead said:
Good report, but a journalism student starting paragraphs with , and, but and however?

Whatever happened to the English language :)
Click to expand...
Isn't journalism a combination of reporting and creative writing? Isn't it, therefore, acceptable to use a slightly different style of writing than one would in, for example, a formal business report or letter?
 
I know its been pick up a few times that last regular season home game and first home game this season were against the same team. Same referee as well.
 
Thanks for all the comments and views, hope you all enjoyed the report. :)
 
Good to see you back Ryan, more power to your elbow!

Ignore the old cynics on here, although to be fair, they have a point about the haircut :)

A serious point though, do you think that sports journalism will exist in a few years for you to make it a career? Trig Jnr (TY) did a masters in journalism and worked as a journalist (not sports) for a few years. He gave up because the increase in amateur online content meant that his newspaper cut back on the number of journalists they employed.

I realise newspapers aren't the be all and end all, but even at my advanced age, I rely on websites like this for my SUFC info, pictures, match reports and even videos, so who's going to employ you?

Careers Advisory Officer Trig
 
On a similar note to the comments above, what you've written matches in style what local papers turn out on a monday edition. That's a pretty limited and cliched genre, so it's good to see you writing about other things. The more varied and intelligent the writing the better.

Oh, and good work on pulling the missus. ;)
 
I could spend about two hours on this...

Over all shows promise and for God's sake keep at it but here goes...

Green is good. Bold green is very good. Red is bad. Bold red is very bad.

A brace from 19 year old Che Adams handed Sheffield United a 2-0 victory over Chesterfield on the competitive home debut of new boss Nigel Adkins.

Here Adkins becomes the focus. Adams was the story really and you got that. Rewrite the bit in red with another focus - something about it being a derby maybe.

Chesterfield’s first away match of the new campaign saw them make what will be their shortest journey of it,

Hideously ugly construction along the lines of Churchill's up with this I will not put. I don't know the technical details but this is a clanger. Often phrased as:

Chesterfield’s first away match of the new campaign saw them make the short journey across the Pennines

Except of course they didn't come across the Pennines - unless they had the coach company we used last week, in which case anything is possible.

heading to Sheffield United with hopes of picking up their first victory at Bramall Lane since 1989 and spoiling Nigel Adkins’ maiden home game in charge of the Blades.

I think this would be fine if you hadn't already mentioned Adkins in the first line. Maiden or simply first ? Depends on your audience.

I'm going to stop there but...
  • listen to your audience
  • take on board what they say
  • don't be blindly obedient (people don't always know what they want).
  • read if you want to be able to write. Read. Read. Read.
Who to read?

I really like Barney Ronay - though this is a million miles from that
Bill Brysons's dad was a local sports journalist held in very high regard
Carlos Arribas (in Spanish - use Google translate) has been recommended to me. I don't read Spanish but you can tell even on crude translation he's got style
George Plimpton is a name - no idea
William Hill Sports Books of the Year

Just read and from what you read create your own voice.

A lot of British sports journalism is functional (they worked hard) - like a lot of the sport. The continentals often embrace the romance (it was a beautiful goal) and philosophy, maybe that could be your angle.

I would say there are some good points made by posters here about the future of journalism. I'd like to think though that there will always be room for good quality writing, so even if people are blogging if you can put together something worth reading then people will pay to read it.

Won't they?

Did I mention you should read?
 
I'm not expert in sports journalism, but the portion of the sports press i enjoy reading the most are the sport supplements in the Sunday broadsheets, especially the features, and also any cricket journalism and the cricket reports, as they are usually in depth, and quite often you can 2 or 3 reports of the same test match, and each all have different angles on play, which the reader can objectively agree or disagree with.

Football forums can be like an extension of the press, as you get different reportage, comments, viewpoints and some very good occasional feature writing in amongst some of the run of the mill daily chatter.

Anyway ryan147 is your Dad still taking pictures of old football grounds and posting them on Facebook, not seen him on the lost football grounds Facebook page for a while.
 



Trigger Blade said:
Good to see you back Ryan, more power to your elbow!

Ignore the old cynics on here, although to be fair, they have a point about the haircut :)

A serious point though, do you think that sports journalism will exist in a few years for you to make it a career? Trig Jnr (TY) did a masters in journalism and worked as a journalist (not sports) for a few years. He gave up because the increase in amateur online content meant that his newspaper cut back on the number of journalists they employed.

I realise newspapers aren't the be all and end all, but even at my advanced age, I rely on websites like this for my SUFC info, pictures, match reports and even videos, so who's going to employ you?

Careers Advisory Officer Trig
Click to expand...

people still need to write the reports for those published on the internet.... or do you think it's a robot? so if you can write a report which can be published in either print or via digital media surely this is still a viable job?
 
As far as I'm concerned, the pinnacle of sports journalism is cricket. The TV coverage is far better than football, the punditry far more insightful and coherent. As for the written coverage, that has more depth, soul, imagination, courage and variety than is ever found within the multitude more columns dedicated to football.

Why there is such a contrast in style and content I don't know. The snobbish origins of the games reflected in the media content, or simply the media showing the grammar/university background of cricket, as opposed to the comprehensive/apprenticeship background of football (massive generalisation I know, but still accurate). Certainly reading the columns of ex-players of both games shows a massive difference, pick any football column and contrast it with the work of ex-England and Middlesex bowler Mike Selvey in the Guardian.

I think what I'm saying in all this, is don't fall into the idiom trap, 'I'm writing about football, so this is how I must write.' I still believe there is a market for football writing more akin in style and content to that of cricket. I think someone above in this thread mentioned the European style (especially the Spanish and Italian) of focussing on the romance of the game and the tradition (rapid disappearing, I know) which shapes much of the game today.

Of the current crop, Brian Glanville, Gabriel Marcotti, Rafael Honigstein, Grant Wahl, Sid Lowe and my favourite David Conn are always worth reading. Others to look back on would include for me Stuart Hall (I know, I know), Eamon Dunphy (ex-player who breaks the mould), David Goldblatt (his Global History is THE reference book), David Winner, Simon Kuper, Arthur Hopcraft, John Moynihan to name but a few. Whilst lauding those, I'd suggest the back catalogue for cricket is a much weightier tome, both in content and style. Old fashioned maybe, but E.W. Swanton, Neville Cardus, John Arlott, Frank Keating, David Frith, Gideon Haigh, CLR James and the aforementioned Selvey are worth reading if only to give a different direction and angle to writing about sport.
 
Hi Ryan, I enjoyed reading your report and I'd like to chip in with my opinion.

I would try to avoid cliché especially the dafter sort - ONLY journalists call two goals 'a brace', write what ordinary people say, we'd say, 'two' or 'a couple' or 'pair', 'brace' being reserved for shot pheasants.

(then again, if a journalism course didn't teach you to use cliché, I don't suppose it would have anything to teach you would it? - I mean, we can all read and write already?)

Also avoid tautology, " Nigel Adkins replacing his sacked namesake Nigel Clough"
isn't 'Nigel Adkins replacing sacked namesake Clough' snappier? - you see he would be called Nigel wouldn't he, being Adkin's namesake....

The worst newspapers (and that's nearly all of them) pad out their reportage with ages of people mentioned, you open with Ché's, there must be a more interesting adjective? Hey and what about a headline, why didn't you have a go at that?


ah, you asked for a reading list,

read BOOKS - read Chandler and Hemingway avoid football writing, if you must read papers(!?) read cricket and boxing reports (the latter are the best sports writing), what about James Ellroy?

You will learn far more about writing and about the world by reading fiction.

Finally consider how the best sports reporters set about their task listen to John Arlott (youtube®? he's dead), Test-Match Special, Peter Alliss and, dare I speak his name, Stuart Hall.......these commentators can invoke the atmosphere of the event, they do more than merely record the mechanical facts of the play.

To sum up,

DON'T resort to journalese normalcy.

DO be aphoristic.

(you may fail your course but you'll be a better writer!)

p.s. BE DIFFERENT (see warning on line above)
 
Haha, again I see we agree South Essexer - we were writing simultaneously

Ryan, read 'The Fight' by Norman Mailer, its about Mohammed Ali and Mohammed Ali is about much more than just boxing.

It is journalism.

and weren't you confused that Sheffield United seem to be playing in the wrong kit? this would have provided the sort of background material that would have taken the piece from the tabloid to the broadsheet (or even to paperback!)

(I'll re-read to make sure you didn't question the livery)
 
Last edited:
vorpal blade said:
Haha, again I see we agree South Essexer - we were writing simultaneously

Ryan, read 'The Fight' by Norman Mailer, its about Mohammed Ali and Mohammed Ali is about much more than just boxing.

It is journalism.

and weren't you confused that Sheffield United seem to be playing in the wrong kit? this would have provided the sort of background material that would have taken the piece from the tabloid to the broadsheet (or even to paperback!)

(I'll re-read to make sure you didn't question the livery)
Click to expand...

Funny you should mention the boxing. Always appealed to me how such a brutal sport brought forth such marvellous prose. And you mentioned the unmentionable Stuart Hall, yes we know as person he's totally discredited, but the work is still masterful, in fact your mention of the kit was interesting because I was thinking, how would Hall have started that report and the kit came to mind.

"On a bright, sunny day in Sheffield there was something uneasy and strange hanging in the Bramall Lane air. Yes, a 4-0 defeat at Gillingham the previous week was more than enough to cause unease, coupled with the sale of the sometime dazzling but oft dallying Jamie Murphy would be enough to cause an atmosphere of anxiety. But there was something else that unsettled as the kick-off was imminent, and then the realisation dawned. Sheffield United were not playing in red and white stripes."
 
I've mentioned before in threads about threads that United has been duped by their tailor - messrs, Dassler in a clear cut case of Emperors' new clothes. I'd like to think Hall may have quoted H.C.Andersen or Danny Kaye?

Speaking of criminals, I realised that a few of the writers I mentioned led rather 'alternative' lifestyles. Perhaps the best preparation for a journo is living a life - fight, booze, shag ..... get caught , no substitute for experience as they say..... though our Ryan will be left with a difficult choice.

I omitted a character almost as unspeakable as Hall;

Jeremy Clarkson. Cut out the 'noise' and listen to his critiques on cars - far, far more interesting, funny and truthful that the journalism of my field which is architecture. I'd love to hear his commentary on a football match (ditto Peter Alliss)

And Essex, most sport (all?) is a version of war with a bit more 'health and safety'.

Aren't the words spent on Boxing marvelous prose because boxing is the purest form of sport, the one which approximates closest to a real fight - the sport with least health and safety?
 
Get hold of a copy of Mcllvanney on Boxing, irrespective of whether you are interested in boxing or not this collection of his various columns and articles are in my opinion the definitive example of sports journalism.
 
Isn't the problem with contemporary football writing about truthfulness?

The faking & diving is now so endemic and deep-rooted that even the referees ignore it, do football reporters bother writing about it anymore?

The reason I suggest Clarkson and Alliss would make interesting football reporters/commentators is because they wouldn't be able to stop themselves laughing at - and reporting on - the cheating that goes on 100s of times every match.

You may not even notice it Ryan because you are too young to have seen much football from earlier more honest times though lower leagues are certainly 'cleaner'.

Speaking of War, Journalism and therefore Propaganda and truth and cleanliness - have you noticed how British champions are never drug cheats?

No names - no pack drill.
 
If I was to write about the match on Saturday I would have introduced it something like this.

On a glorious summer Saturday afternoon, Sheffield United welcomed near neighbours in what promised to be an intriguing encounter at Bramall Lane. Both sides went in to this game after enjoying vastly different starts to the season on the opening day of the season. The pre-season favourites the Blades slumping to a abject 4-0 defeat at an unfancied Gillingham side, whilst their opponents were buoyant after a superb opening day win at home to Barnsley.

Personally I think in any Sports Reportage the opening paragraph is the most crucial one, as it is the one that sets the tone for the rest of the article.
 
[

You may not even notice it Ryan because you are too young to have seen much football from earlier more honest times though lower leagues are certainly 'cleaner'.

Speaking of War, Journalism and therefore Propaganda and truth and cleanliness - have you noticed how British champions are never drug cheats?

No names - no pack drill.[/QUOTE]

I have to say that here you tap on something that sort of runs through the blood. I'm related, through my paternal grandmother, to the late Frank Gillard. In fact, Ryan, there's a man to listen to (and read) on whole areas of journalism, particularly radio.
 
Follow this rule from the greatest story-teller the world has ever known. It is the very essence of creative writing.

There either is or is not, that’s the way things are. The colour of the day. The way it felt to be a child. The saltwater on your sunburnt legs. Sometimes the water is yellow, sometimes it’s red. But what colour it may be in memory, depends on the day. I’m not going to tell you the story the way it happened. I’m going to tell it the way I remember it....

Reading Dickens is like watching Pele. They have no peers.
 



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