It's just chimed midnight

[GreasyChipBeattie]

Cinderella is running back to the house, her ball gown returning to a tatty old frock.
The pristine thoroughbreds shrinking like violets into weak, scrawny mice.
The magic has gone, and so has the fairy Godmother.
The replacement prince better have a shit load magic in his own back pocket, cos he'll need it to get Cinderella to anything like her best again.
At least the ugly sisters are in a worse state.

 

[Jon Bon II]

Meanwhile, 'Jack' Wilder was given a cow to take to market and came back with just a pocketful of beans - none of which were magic.

 

[northsomersetblade]

Meanwhile, 'Jack' Wilder was given a cow to take to market and came back with just a pocketful of beans - none of which were magic.

None of them germinated and some of them were rotten

 

[3-GBlade]

Better stories start with
"the clock struck thirteen"

 

[Keef Chedwyn]

Do you ever get that feeling that you really want to start a new thread but you can't think of anything to write so you just put any old shit down and think fuck it, I'm just gonna post it, see what happens?

 

[knowsnowt]

Do you ever get that feeling that you really want to start a new thread but you can't think of anything to write so you just put any old shit down and think fuck it, I'm just gonna post it, see what happens?

Yeah. Often.
I've about a 12% success rate.
I do like the scattergun approach though.
Worked for McCabe eventually.

 

[Stegosaurus]

Do you ever get that feeling that you really want to start a new thread but you can't think of anything to write so you just put any old shit down and think fuck it, I'm just gonna post it, see what happens?

Hi Stegosaurus here

That's all of my threads. And most of my posts

 

[Edgar Allan Poo]

Cinderella is running back to the house, her ball gown returning to a tatty old frock.
The pristine thoroughbreds shrinking like violets into weak, scrawny mice.
The magic has gone, and so has the fairy Godmother.
The replacement prince better have a shit load magic in his own back pocket, cos he'll need it to get Cinderella to anything like her best again.
At least the ugly sisters are in a worse state.

Will this be on at the Lyceum in time for Christmas?

 

[Cheesebored]

Will this be on at the Lyceum in time for Christmas?

Yeah but it gets pulled due to the predicted spike in covid cases and is cancelled along with all Christmas celebrations. Have a great day.

 

[Robby Blade]

None of them germinated and some of them were rotten

But a couple were saved for the following year and grew into the biggest, strongest beans in the village.

 

[diode_blade]

Cinderella is running back to the house, her ball gown returning to a tatty old frock.
The pristine thoroughbreds shrinking like violets into weak, scrawny mice.
The magic has gone, and so has the fairy Godmother.
The replacement prince better have a shit load magic in his own back pocket, cos he'll need it to get Cinderella to anything like her best again.
At least the ugly sisters are in a worse state.

Yeah, your chuffing grandfather clock woke me up, ****

 

[raul]

Will this be on at the Lyceum in time for Christmas?

Just got hold of the script. Guess who is playing Fairy Godmother....

" I've always felt I'd end up with this job me, and I think, if you asked Cinders, she'd probably say I am the best FG she's ever worked with"

 

[Blade-on-Tyne]

Cinderella is running back to the house, her ball gown returning to a tatty old frock.
The pristine thoroughbreds shrinking like violets into weak, scrawny mice.
The magic has gone, and so has the fairy Godmother.
The replacement prince better have a shit load magic in his own back pocket, cos he'll need it to get Cinderella to anything like her best again.
At least the ugly sisters are in a worse state.

At least there’s still a Prince but whether or not he’s Charming is debatable.
All the ugly sisters have got is sore feet and Baron Hardup who’s had to mortgage Ferroxide Castle.

 

[Edgar Allan Poo]

Just got hold of the script. Guess who is playing Fairy Godmother....

" I've always felt I'd end up with this job me, and I think, if you asked Cinders, she'd probably say I am the best FG she's ever worked with"

I see an Olivier award on the horizon.

 

[broomhillblade]

Meanwhile the 3-5-2 little pigs huffed and puffed but couldn't even manage a shot on goal.

 

[The Crab]

Meanwhile, 'Jack' Wilder was given a cow to take to market and came back with just a pocketful of beans - none of which were magic.

And the Ghost of Crabmas past said "no refunds"

 

[The Crab]

Just got hold of the script. Guess who is playing Fairy Godmother....

" I've always felt I'd end up with this job me, and I think, if you asked Cinders, she'd probably say I am the best FG she's ever worked with"

Best bunch of Dwarves I've ever worked with

 

[Jon Bon II]

But a couple were saved for the following year and grew into the biggest, strongest beans in the village.

But they were still beans then? Just bigger? No shoots, stalk, stem or greenery, just beans???

 

[Sean Thornton]

Will this be on at the Lyceum in time for Christmas?

Yes, but every character will be an Ugly Sister.

 

[The Crab]

Yes, but every character will be an Ugly Sister.

It'll be slim pickings at The Bessemer that night then

 

[Sean Thornton]

It'll be slim pickings at The Bessemer that night then

Dame Bettis : Right then boys and girls.....

Audience : He’s behind you

Robboblade : On no he isnt

Audience ; Oh yes he is

Robboblade : Oh no he isn’t, the roof still leaks at Shirecliffe and the new fifty thousand stadium hasn’t been built.

Ali Baba : Let’s get something straight, the 40 Wage Thieves are nothing to do with me. Aladdin signed them

Wishee Washed up : Told you how this would turn out. No bigger Blade than me Seth ( audience hisses)

Dick Wit ington : Onwards to the Glasgow where the streets are paved with Peroni. Catch me on Twitter

Jimphippy Cricket :
What is a conscience! I'll tell ya! A conscience is that still small voice people won't listen to. That's just the trouble with the world today. Vote Trump!

Audience : No forrins !

On come Neil and Blackie

Audience boos : get off you ugly bastards.

Neil : They mean you Kev, off you go.


Aladdin : Players shit, board shit, do gooders and lefties shit.

Sings “it wasn’t me”

Wishee Washed up : Shall we get the old gang back together!

Aladdin : Dont you thinks things are bad enough?

sings “A whole new United world” dons kilt and balaclava follows a sign that says “North”

Ali Baba : you might be going south Aladdin.......

Aladdin : l’ll be back.

Audience cheers :: good luck Aladdin, we really did love you!


Aladdin : and I’ll be back for Lunny!

Audience cheer more loudly, start to conga.

Closing refrain : “Someday my Prince will come”.

 

[Ralph Blade]

‘Turn again Chris Wilder, Lord of Bramall Lane’

’Now if we all close our eyes and wish very hard’

 

[Eyeball]

It'll be slim pickings at The Bessemer that night then

Normal then

 

[Sean Thornton]

Normal then

Slim isn’t a word often used in the Bessemer........

 

[Edgar Allan Poo]

Dame Bettis : Right then boys and girls.....

Audience : He’s behind you

Robboblade : On no he isnt

Audience ; Oh yes he is

Robboblade : Oh no he isn’t, the roof still leaks at Shirecliffe and the new fifty thousand stadium hasn’t been built.

Ali Baba : Let’s get something straight, the 40 Wage Thieves are nothing to do with me. Aladdin signed them

Wishee Washed up : Told you how this would turn out. No bigger Blade than me Seth ( audience hisses)

Dick Wit ington : Onwards to the Glasgow where the streets are paved with Peroni. Catch me on Twitter

Jimphippy Cricket :
What is a conscience! I'll tell ya! A conscience is that still small voice people won't listen to. That's just the trouble with the world today. Vote Trump!

Audience : No forrins !

On come Neil and Blackie

Audience boos : get off you ugly bastards.

Neil : They mean you Kev, off you go.


Aladdin : Players shit, board shit, do gooders and lefties shit.

Sings “it wasn’t me”

Wishee Washed up : Shall we get the old gang back together!

Aladdin : Dont you thinks things are bad enough?

sings “A whole new United world” dons kilt and balaclava follows a sign that says “North”

Ali Baba : you might be going south Aladdin.......

Aladdin : l’ll be back.

Audience cheers :: good luck Aladdin, we really did love you!


Aladdin : and I’ll be back for Lunny!

Audience cheer more loudly, start to conga.

Closing refrain : “Someday my Prince will come”.

Laughed till I cried even spilling my Fatty Foulkes limited edition size cola in my lap. Now it looks like I actually wet myself. I haven't though. The Star review claims the show would have been a great mother's day treat. Had they been allowed any proper treats of course.

 

[The Crab]

Normal then

Normal in a Mos Eisley way yes.........

 

[XM657]

It'll be slim pickings at The Bessemer that night then

Second time he's been mentioned in the last few days