Selling the positives?

[Bell4]

Read loads about how we can’t attract players for one or many reasons or another .

But if you were selling the positives to any potential incoming player to get him over the line

What would you say ?….

 

[Bladesman]

Parking is free
Wash at home
You can have any leftover pies after a match

 

[SwissBlade]

Parking is free
Wash at home
You can have any leftover pies after a match to use as door stops or weights

Fixed it for you

 

[Superblades]

You won’t be given the spot in the changing room at Shirecliffe, where the leaking roof is constantly dripping on your head.

 

[robbiez666]

Less than an hour on a train to Leeds or Manchester and 2 hours to London.

 

[KoppedOff]

Gary Sinclair will sort you out with free entry to Maggie Mays where you can hobnob with stars like Johnny Depp and a bloke who went on Come Dine With Me in 2016.

 

[BladesNo9]

If you come back in approximately 3yrs & 10months hopefully poundland and his puppet dingle will be gone.
What more could a player/anyone ask for?

 

[SwissBlade]

• Great legal representation for those little misdemeanours
• Discount cards for Macdonalds and KFC, just use the Code “lys”
• excellent opportunities to explore new injuries thanks to our fabulous training facilities ( our personal recommendation is the torn hamstring)
• Top fashion advice from the Burkemeister (offer may end soon)

 

[Whiston Blade]

• The Parkway can get you away from the city in under 10 minutes*
• If we sign you it’s because our 1st & 2nd choice targets wanted more money
• Manchester & Birmingham are under 2 hours drive away**
• We’re getting a brand new training ground***

*If you want to leave after 6pm or before 10am
**If you take into account point one
***Once we find a plot of land, buy it, get the plans drawn up, approved and then constructed, which there’s a good chance you’ve already moved on by then

 

[Davalon]

Poundland, two Greggs, Pound Bakery, and shouty spice dealers all within a comfortable 5 to 10 minute walk from the ground

 

[Scarebus]

Poundland, two Greggs, Pound Bakery, and shouty spice dealers

And that's just the club's board of directors

 

[BigBed]

It's better than going to Hillsborough!

 

[Davalon]

It's better than going to Hillsborough!

The first serious reply

 

[Edgar Allan Poo]

Read loads about how we can’t attract players for one or many reasons or another .

But if you were selling the positives to any potential incoming player to get him over the line

What would you say ?….

Room share offer with Captain Blade.
Free self defence classes with Ollie McBurnie.
Orange Lamborghini (one previous owner).

 

[AdamSufc1997]

There's a amazing chip shop you can queue in for 2 hours on match days

 

[Cappy]

I’d get McGoldrick to chat to any potential striker

“They’ll treat you like a club legend even if you can’t fucking score. Oh, and if you do score, remember to pose like a T-Rex having arm cramps”

 

[Bladesince59]

Read loads about how we can’t attract players for one or many reasons or another .

But if you were selling the positives to any potential incoming player to get him over the line

What would you say ?….

Just count the number of Greggs on Fargate and the Moor

 

[247Blade]

Parking is free
Wash at home
You can have any leftover pies after a match

Thought they kept pies for next match?!

 

[bladesmanluke]

We're highly unlikely to sign anyone else to take the shirt off you because we're incapable of completing transfers.

 

[Kozzy_is_my_Dad]

Selling the positives?

Sounds like our approach to the transfer window...

 

[Houston_Blade]

Open air indoor training facilities. A world’s first!

 

[Kevincarterversion2.0]

Dont worry about failing at the end of the season as our club celebrates failure.
You'll be considered a cult hero if you run around a lot.
The majority of our supporters prefer Championship football so all you have to do is finish in the top half

That's got to appeal....

 

[Darthblade]

Reality ..... if we sign two decent CH's, a DM and two CM and a striker who can score 25 goals ...... then we could make the play-offs and you could experience the pain of failing in the play-offs with us
UTB & FTP

 

[Rodley]

Open air indoor training facilities. A world’s first!

Training pitch 3 has its own pond so bring your Koi Carp?

 

[jt64]

While the amount of wages being offered is probably shit, you will at least get them paid on time