A yank who would appreciate some SUFC culture- and general football schooling

[HodgysBrokenThumb]

Football fans are an emotional lot, which you may wish to include. They express emotions about football much more easily than about their loved ones. People on here fall out with each other, but any crisis, and all rally round. The 'enemy' are insulted in the crudest terms, but again in a crisis, we are all football family ( you may have seen that a seriously ill Wednesdayite has been sponsored big money to plant a United flag on Everest; he was given a warm reception pitch-side at a recent game.)
By the way, are you setting the novel in Sheffield, or a place with a fictional name which we will assume is Sheffield? If you set it in Sheffield, you will have to work hard not to make basic errors which will provoke meltdown on here. I have in mind a sentence such as 'Dean Hammond thrilled the blue-and-White bedecked Blades fans by scoring the winning goal with a long-range shot which confirmed his standing as the fans' favourite.'

 

[alcoblade]

Jennifer,

The key points of being a Blade are

1: We are a 2 club city, "

To be more accurate, a 1.5 club city.

Us, representing the city itself. And Wednesday, just about keeping within the boundary, but really a suburb of South Barnsley.

UTB

 

[Esablade]

Well, as SHE is an American from my neck of the woods, born and raised, she doesn't really have a dog in the fight, as it were.

Ah, guess you're yet to realise just how 'massive' and far reaching t'pigs are..

 

[ThroughThinAndThinner]

This story is being told in first person, by my primary protagonist. I guess you could say I envision what I want to happen. Where I want it to start, what I want to the end result to be, and then go at it. Sometimes, when I'm in-scene, I realize something's not right. Either it's not something the character would do, or something else would be better because it would elevate conflict or tension, or it's too early in the progression of events for THAT THING to happen. I am a planner, for sure, but I'm not so fastidious about it that I can't change things when it's called for.

So do you include in the protagonists thoughts, how do you go about writing those in? Had a bash at writing in first person but I find it really challenging, don't want to be writing "I thought..." Cos that's just gonna bore everyone to death.

 

[Jennifer]

By the way, are you setting the novel in Sheffield, or a place with a fictional name which we will assume is Sheffield? If you set it in Sheffield, you will have to work hard not to make basic errors which will provoke meltdown on here. I have in mind a sentence such as 'Dean Hammond thrilled the blue-and-White bedecked Blades fans by scoring the winning goal with a long-range shot which confirmed his standing as the fans' favourite.'

Nope. Not set in Sheffield. Set in present, my neck of the woods. Actually, in a small town where my Dad grew up. About thirty miles from where I currently live.

 

[fishpie]

Oh, and I get along better with guys, anyway. You tend to be less dramatic than us girls, and more fun. If you get on my nerves, I'll just tell you to sod off, how's that?

Good luck with your book Jennifer. And if you're interested in testing your theory on guys being less dramatic than us girls, and more fun.....I suggest you stick around on here for a bit ..UTB

 

[Jennifer]

UTB?

 

[UnitedBlade]

UTB?

Up The Blades !

 

[Yellarbellyblade]

UTB?

And COYRAWW is Come On You Red And White Wizards in case you see that

 

[HodgysBrokenThumb]

Nope. Not set in Sheffield. Set in present, my neck of the woods. Actually, in a small town where my Dad grew up. About thirty miles from where I currently live.

Apologies if I wasn't paying attention earlier. That looks like a manageable project.

 

[Cerberus Blade]

Will do, thanks!

Nope, not a porno. Rimshot is that drum and cymbals combo that sometimes follows and extremely LAME joke! Chef from Sheffield. Yeah, it was a little late (for me) when I did that.

You could get yourself into a lot of bother asking for "rimshots" in Sheffield!

The story of United goes like this:

Formed (beautifully.

Became a leading force in English football.

Had the worlds fattest goalkeeper.

Won a few things of significance.

Won nowt for the next hundred years.

Went up and down more times than a Bride's nightie.

Sunk right down to the depths.

Came back up again.

Sold off their prize assets.

Hired crap managers and players then got a good one and returned to the top level.

Cheated out of being at the top level twice.

Hired more crap managers and went back down to level 3.

Nearly got back up to level 2 several times but had cruel luck.

Hired a good manager and are back on their way to level 2.

Cue: RIMSHOT!

 

[UnitedBlade]

More worthwhile viewing is Golden Gordon written by former Monty Python actors Michael Palin and Terry Jones.

Michael Palin is from Sheffield and supports the Blades. It is no coincidence that Barnstoneworth United play in red and white stripes and it covers what it is like to support the Blades.



This is also a good summary of what football is about from the same programme.

 

[Yellarbellyblade]

Something else you need to do is google "The Greasy Chip Butty Song" and watch that on YouTube. This is our supporters anthem sung at the start of each half and usually towards the end of matches. Think "you'll never walk alone" with humour rather than pathos!

Sung to Annie's Song by John Denver

You fill up my senses
Like a gallon of Magnet
Like a packet of woodbines
Like a good pinch of snuff
Like a night out in Sheffield
Like a greasy chip butty
Like Sheffield United
Come thrill me again
Nah nah nah nah nah nah OOOH

 

[Greenwich Blade]

Ho Soccer Mom!

A bit of reading to get you started here. Also get 'Among The Thugs' by Bill Buford (a fellow American). You'll think he's exagerrating the violence and craziness that overcomes England on any Saturday during the football season. He isn't.

Not to mention this literary effort, although I'm a bit miffed by the presence of not one but TWO copies going for a penny. Not that it makes any difference to me these days as I long-since stopped making any money out of it.

 

[Jennifer]

Thanks for all the help so far, guys, and the lovely welcome. I appreciate it! Fair warning, though . . . This is just the beginning![

 

[BornOnShorehamStreet]

Oh, and I get along better with guys, anyway. You tend to be less dramatic than us girls, and more fun. If you get on my nerves, I'll just tell you to sod off, how's that?

You're right there.

There are absolutely NO Drama Queens here

(Google it )

 

[Yellarbellyblade]

Thanks for all the help so far, guys, and the lovely welcome. I appreciate it! Fair warning, though . . . This is just the beginning![

Always welcome back Jen, careful though you could end up a Blade and condemn yourself to a life of misery with only brief moments of joy! None of us would choose anything else though.

 

[Yellarbellyblade]

Oh and any chef worth his salt from
Sheffield would always have a ready supply of

 

[Tunstall Fred]

Oh and any chef worth his salt from
Sheffield would always have a ready supply of View attachment 24825

It would be the red and white striped version though surely

 

[Yellarbellyblade]

Yes my mistake




Better?

 

[Tunstall Fred]

Yes my mistake

View attachment 24826


Better?

Oh yes,take note American girl,Mr Yellarbelly has got it exactly right

 

[Jennifer]

Might have to try this Hendo's of which you all speak. Probably have to order it online, though.

 

[The Crab]

Oh, and I get along better with guys, anyway. You tend to be less dramatic than us girls, and more fun. If you get on my nerves, I'll just tell you to sod off, how's that?

You wouldn't be the first, they don't usually say "sod" though.

 

[Tunstall Fred]

Might have to try this Hendo's of which you all speak. Probably have to order it online, though.

Anyone mentions some other condiment,get your baseball bat out,give them a whack round the chops

ps,order a t shirt whilst your at it ordering your bottle online,very natty attire

 

[SouthEssexBlade]

Might have to try this Hendo's of which you all speak. Probably have to order it online, though.

https://www.buy-hendos.co.uk/

 

[Yellarbellyblade]

Might have to try this Hendo's of which you all speak. Probably have to order it online, though.

Think Worcestershire sauce only much much better! (Vegan friendly too in case you're bothered!)

 

[Dellas Cowboys]

no-one mentioned the term Hendo's

 

[Yellarbellyblade]

https://www.buy-hendos.co.uk/

Yes they did

 

[northsomersetblade]

Your name is Jennifer. Jennifer. It never suited ya

 

[Jennifer]

Your name is Jennifer. Jennifer. It never suited ya

Only because the name was huge in the late 1970s. Which meant I was never the only one in my class with that name. I wanted to be the only one. Other than that I have embraced it. Legend has it it is derived from the name Guinevere. And I can handle that.