IamA: I am Christian Nadé, ex striker for the Blades. Ask me anyhting!

[Jon Bon]

Thank you Chris, that's a great answer but Screech had an underlying temper like that of a ginger lass. You could never be sure that he wouldn't have a blade concealed about his person and pull it out during a tantrum. I'm happy to go toe to toe with anyone but I do admit to running like a girl, away from red faced ginger lasses in the heat of battle.

 

[Foxy]

Hi Christian, are we still on for next week? Don't forget that £20 you owe me.

 

[Dkc]

What's French for "When does the season start?"

 

[FattyFatterson]

My responsibilities at SUFC were to score awesome goals against Arsenal and assist Colin Kazim-Richards to score goals against Bolton. Your bowels aren't my responsibility I'm afraid. See a doctor though; they might be able to help.

Christy, mI owd french onion, I'm sure piss comes from the bladder and not the bowels???

 

[Jon Bon]

Chris, my good friend and Blades mad Tamil Tiger, Ahwin Sahwin, will be coming over from Ceylon for the Chesterfield match. He has been a big fan of yours since he saw you hit the Lane end clock from around the penalty spot - a feat he says he would never have believed if he hadn't witnessed it with his own eyes. Any chance that you will be around to sign his Blades shirt and buy him a coffee?

 

[Nade]

Thank you Chris, that's a great answer but Screech had an underlying temper like that of a ginger lass. You could never be sure that he wouldn't have a blade concealed about his person and pull it out during a tantrum. I'm happy to go toe to toe with anyone but I do admit to running like a girl, away from red faced ginger lasses in the heat of battle.

I think you underestimate how forceful Rifkin can be when confronted with an underage boy. Then again, Tory policy states clearly that underage boys are only fair game if it takes place at a designed hostel, so maybe Screech will stand a chance anyway.

 

[Nade]

Christy..was Danny Webber willing to help you out in your assimilation into Sheffield life? Did Paddy Kenny buy any greasy chip butties?

Danny and Paddy were alright. Me and David Sommeil spent a lot of time together though, probably more than anyone else. He's a lovely man is David. I wish him well.

 

[Nade]

Hi Christian, are we still on for next week? Don't forget that £20 you owe me.

I don't think I owe you anything. You said I could have it for free if I snorted all of it.

 

[Nade]

What's French for "When does the season start?"

If you ever need to speak to a French person, the best way is to speak slowly, in a French accent, and to speak with the grammar slightly different. Odds are you're speaking French.

 

[Nade]

Christy, mI owd french onion, I'm sure piss comes from the bladder and not the bowels???

My apologies.

 

[Nade]

Chris, my good friend and Blades mad Tamil Tiger, Ahwin Sahwin, will be coming over from Ceylon for the Chesterfield match. He has been a big fan of yours since he saw you hit the Lane end clock from around the penalty spot - a feat he says he would never have believed if he hadn't witnessed it with his own eyes. Any chance that you will be around to sign his Blades shirt and buy him a coffee?

I'm in Scotland at the moment pal. If he's ever up here though let me know.

 

[Jehovah]

Mr Nade, my mate bet on the blades to beat Arsenal 1-0 with you to score at over 150/1. He paid for my beer all night which ultimately led to my arrest. I just want to say thank you for an amazing night.

 

[Pedro Verde]

Im Pedro Verde and Ive still got the County Cup
Mi nephew t'old Juan still wants to play for The Blades hes gettin on abit now tho

 

[diplomat]

Hi Christian, you will be forever remembered fondly for the Arsenal game, thank you.

What is your favourite memory from your time at the Lane?

Upon signing was there an initiation ceremony that you had to go through to become one of the boys?

 

[Jon Bon]

Chris, you're a big, burly black guy - not that it should have anything to do with it but you obviously know how to handle yourself, being from the more run down end of town and will be accustomed to packing heat. How much would you charge for bumping two people off? I'm not bothered about how you do it or disposing of the bodies but I would, of course, be willing to pay a bit extra if you could do it while they were in the middle of doing Saturday Night Takeaway Live. Let me know pal, ok?

 

[United Aren't Back.]

Christian
Was Andy Gray any good on the training pitch? Did Rob Kozluk like beans on toast?

 

[United Aren't Back.]

Im Pedro Verde and Ive still got the County Cup
Mi nephew t'old Juan still wants to play for The Blades hes gettin on abit now tho

Yes hes just the correct age now..sign the old has been up. You'll be ok to play too Pedro. Brian Deane may sign again to outdo Billy Sharp for spells at the lane.

 

[shorehamview]

Are you on glue? Or Greggs?

 

[BornOnShorehamStreet]

I believe that the fall of the Berlin Wall was the end of modernity in the sociological sense.

But wasn't it caused by shite Soviet Union mortar?

 

[axel smeets]

I always imagined you had a massive cock. Can you confirm it is larger than 10'?

 

[SUFC Guy]

I always imagined you had a massive cock. Can you confirm it is larger than 10'?

Wow! 10 foot? I thought it was just a myth

 

[boo radley]

When are you next down to see us? This little place ( the forum members) would like to get together with you to re enforce your hero status. You must be up for that.

 

[Sean Thornton]

My responsibilities at SUFC were to score awesome goals against Arsenal and assist Colin Kazim-Richards to score goals against Bolton. Your bowels aren't my responsibility I'm afraid. See a doctor though; they might be able to help.

See a doctor that knows the difference between bowels and your bladder though.

Christian, steak bake or cheese and onion slice ?

 

[axel smeets]

Wow! 10 foot? I thought it was just a myth

I always imagined it was massive.

 

[Nade]

Mr Nade, my mate bet on the blades to beat Arsenal 1-0 with you to score at over 150/1. He paid for my beer all night which ultimately led to my arrest. I just want to say thank you for an amazing night.

I'm glad to have been of service. Although Philip did very well too as the keeper when Paddy got injured. I donned the absolute shit out of Toure and Lehman, but the game wouldn't have been won without everyone working together.

Hi Christian, you will be forever remembered fondly for the Arsenal game, thank you.

What is your favourite memory from your time at the Lane?

Upon signing was there an initiation ceremony that you had to go through to become one of the boys?

My favourite memory was either scoring the Arsenal goal or discovering the Devonshire Chippy. The lad at BDTBL were a bit of a strange bunch when I joined. After the first training back all the new lads had to play soggy biscuit in the changing rooms, with everyone else watching around them. Claude Davis lost and he's never been the same since. He pulled a blade on Akinibiyi a few months later for winding him up about it.

Chris, you're a big, burly black guy - not that it should have anything to do with it but you obviously know how to handle yourself, being from the more run down end of town and will be accustomed to packing heat. How much would you charge for bumping two people off? I'm not bothered about how you do it or disposing of the bodies but I would, of course, be willing to pay a bit extra if you could do it while they were in the middle of doing Saturday Night Takeaway Live. Let me know pal, ok?

Discretion is vital. PM me first with the details and whether you're serious, then I'll give you my Agora Marketplace username and we'll go from there.

Being French, I love the use of a guillotine, so any ideas would have to revolve around me being able to transport the materials to construct one in the vicinity of where the murder would take place.

The best way to dispose of bodies, by the way, is to put them through a heavy woodchipper numerous times to reduce the body to a fine powder. Then, with the powder, you simply redecorate your entire house and mix the powder in with the wallpaper paste. The police are very thorough but they don't look behind the wallpaper.

Christian
Was Andy Gray any good on the training pitch? Did Rob Kozluk like beans on toast?

Andy left before I joined, I'm afraid. Rob was as much of a bastersaurus as is rumoured. He did enjoy his beans on toast but only with cheese, and he also puts the cheese under the toast and puts the beans on everything, which I found ridiculous. He left at the same time as me in disgrace, after it was found out that he was putting Worcester sauce on his beans instead of something else.

Are you on glue? Or Greggs?

I do like Greg Dyke and I think he's doing his best in a difficult position.

I always imagined you had a massive cock. Can you confirm it is larger than 10'?

I only have one leg. My cock is my other leg.

When are you next down to see us? This little place ( the forum members) would like to get together with you to re enforce your hero status. You must be up for that.

It depends when I can get time off. I'm working my balls off trying to get in proper shape, but I'll nip down when I get the chance.

See a doctor that knows the difference between bowels and your bladder though.

Christian, steak bake or cheese and onion slice ?

It's because I'm French. The word is the same in French.

I'm extremely partial to the steak bake, and those caramel bread things with the curly toffee chocolate sprinkles on them. Dunno what they're called but they're the bollocks. I'd often go to the Greggs next to Playtime in town and then sit in the Peace Gardens looking around. The Peace Gardens are nice but I came to Sheffield to see the old building that used to be there. My favourite movie is Threads and it showed some remarkable looking buildings getting blown up. There was one overlooking the Peace Gardens that I was looking forward to seeing but I was told after moving there that it got demolished in real life too.

 

[diplomat]

I love this thread

 

[Bedrock Blade]

Hi Chris. Did you put the Ram in the Ramalama dingdong?

 

[stringjunior]

Hi Chris. Did you put the Ram in the Ramalama dingdong?

Think we can end the thread here. Just spat mi tea out laughing

 

[BeakerBlade]

Christian, being a French man, how would you advise a Northern English man on correctly saying the word croissant ?

 

[stringjunior]

Christian, if the hokey kokey is what it's all about, what then for civilisation?