Early leavers

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corner_flag said:
The secret to avoiding traffic jams is to park further away from the ground. A 10 minute walk is good for your blood pressure, better than sitting in the queues of stuck cars you will walk past.
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The secret to avoiding traffic jams is to get the bus down, and go to the pub after the match. A few pints and you won’t give a shit about any traffic.
 

Tut.

The OP has been around this forum long enough to know that no-one should ever be allowed to leave the ground at any time other than the precise moment mandated by the “Ok, you are permitted to leave now police”.

This is because: (a) there should only ever be one permissable way of enjoying a trip to the Lane; and (b) everyone’s circumstances and preferences are, or bloody well should be, identical.

Also, if we’ve got to put up with what seems to be coming over the hill this season, then so should every other bugger.

West Yorks nails it:-

west_yorks_blade said:
Under the new regs, no one is allowed to leave before the final whistle.

Stewards will be empowered to shove people back down into their seats if they are seen trying to go early.

If necessary, they will be able to sit on fans laps to prevent ‘persistent exiting’*

* except of course on the kop, where no bastard has room for their own lap, never mind anyone else’s.
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My favourite "leaving early" anecdote,which I've probably told before, was Pete, who sat next to us in the South Stand at the time, he left the FA Cup game v Blackburn in 1993 rather early. He went just after 80 minutes, we were 1-0 down and he managed to miss our Mitch Ward equaliser on 82 minutes, plus two more goals in extra time, including another one from Mitch and a penalty shoot out, which we won! Pete used to say he went early to miss the traffic and that night, he missed it by just over an hour :)
 
I will be adopting the following simple method -

Winning, Level or one down up to full time = Leave after final whistle
Losing by 2 or 3 between 60 minutes and full time = Leave 5 to 10 minutes early
Losing by 4 or more between 60 minutes and full time = Leave when the goal is scored that puts us 4 down
Losing by 4 or more at HT = Give it 5 minutes after HT, then bugger off if same score or worse. If losing by less than 4 when the 5 minutes grace is up, stay a further 5 minutes and then double that time every time the deficit is reduced by 1 goal, until just one goal down, parity is restored or the lead is taken. Then stay until full time. However, if at any time after parity, the score slips back to 1 down; or if at 1 down, the score slips to 2 down, I may leave at any time thereafter.
 
If last Saturday is anything to go off, I'll be gone in the first 20 - See the rest of the shipping continue via Gillette in the Cricketers.
 
Billyblade said:
The secret to avoiding traffic jams
  • Watch the entire match
  • Clap the team off (or conscientiously object, no booing)
  • Wait for the seats to clear a little
  • Bid farewell to your seat neighbours
  • Casually stroll towards the exit
  • Have a leisurely piss on the way out
  • Casually stroll back to your vehicle.
  • Put the radio on and listen to Mark the Bankrobber telling you that HMS piss the league will set sail again soon
  • Drive home.
It doesn't really take that long to clear folks, it's not fecking Wembley.
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Good post, but you forget to add the alternative:
• Get the bus
 
ShockingBadBuy said:
Tut.

The OP has been around this forum long enough to know that no-one should ever be allowed to leave the ground at any time other than the precise moment mandated by the “Ok, you are permitted to leave now police”.

This is because: (a) there should only ever be one permissable way of enjoying a trip to the Lane; and (b) everyone’s circumstances and preferences are, or bloody well should be, identical.

Also, if we’ve got to put up with what seems to be coming over the hill this season, then so should every other bugger.

West Yorks nails it:-
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Bollocks it's a free 🤣 country .... I won't be locked in to see the shitshow!!!!!!!
 
247Blade said:
Free Country so bollox and shoce it!
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Can do, if you want.

Though if you’ve missed the irony in my last two posts, I’m guessing the free country you’re from is the other side of the Atlantic.
 

Wonder if anyone has ever left a game early enough that they managed to catch the final whistle on tv at home
 
Danetheblade said:
If you’ve left early today.. you’re all pigs.
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If you're being serious then shut up and stop being so self righteous.

Everyone has a choice to stay and leave. There's no "true blade" rulebook.

So well done you for winning the best Blades fan ever award for the 10th year running. You're a legend. Congratulations. Stick it on your CV as a lifetime achievment.

If you're not being serious then ignore the above.
 
Tony_Kaufman said:
If you're being serious then shut up and stop being so self righteous.

Everyone has a choice to stay and leave. There's no "true blade" rulebook.

So well done you for winning the best Blades fan ever award for the 10th year running. You're a legend. Congratulations. Stick it on your CV as a lifetime achievment.

If you're not being serious then ignore the above.
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It’s… it’s a joke bud 😬
 
I left the pub I was in (there was an absolute prick of a Newcastle fan with an East Midlands accent in there) to go and listen to a mediocre covers band in another pub.
 

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