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Nade

Nade

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I've written a new rhyme for us to recite on the Kop. The meter and the language might be a bit of a stretch, but with a bit of practice I think it can be the anthem for many a fan. It is inspired by the works of Geoffrey Chaucer.

The Metye Blydese

A Sheffeld mitel knyf I has in mye hande.

As I cot intoe a pye it tastese veyre grande

I walke downe the layne and see the Laver stande

The metye bladese ere is wheyre they playe

Sometymes by nighte; ofte by daye

Outside the stande with my pye I nowe dwell

Surrowndede by rede and whyt apparele

I soake up the sphere as I hear a manne

Showteds lowdlye ‘thipunde yer matche programe’

I goe for a slashe in the backe of the koppe

Mi pynis so colde I thenk it been choppe

Fycking bich of a tickete layde lyed to me

Whene she sayde id be ayble to see

I sitte in my sete reyt behinde a pillare

My vewe is so shyt it cude mek me a kyllare

Starte to watche the gyme that is playd

And get angrye at the mighte blaydes

I get workede upe vyrily angrye

At unyted instede of those closeste to me

I get angrye becos shyte is my lyfe

But nowe we playe welle, I’ll instede bete mye wyfe
 

Nade said:
I've written a new rhyme for us to recite on the Kop. The meter and the language might be a bit of a stretch, but with a bit of practice I think it can be the anthem for many a fan. It is inspired by the works of Geoffrey Chaucer.

The Metye Blydese

A Sheffeld mitel knyf I has in mye hande.

As I cot intoe a pye it tastese veyre grande

I walke downe the layne and see the Laver stande

The metye bladese ere is wheyre they playe

Sometymes by nighte; ofte by daye

Outside the stande with my pye I nowe dwell

Surrowndede by rede and whyt apparele

I soake up the sphere as I hear a manne

Showteds lowdlye ‘thipunde yer matche programe’

I goe for a slashe in the backe of the koppe

Mi pynis so colde I thenk it been choppe

Fycking bich of a tickete layde lyed to me

Whene she sayde id be ayble to see

I sitte in my sete reyt behinde a pillare

My vewe is so shyt it cude mek me a kyllare

Starte to watche the gyme that is playd

And get angrye at the mighte blaydes

I get workede upe vyrily angrye

At unyted instede of those closeste to me

I get angrye becos shyte is my lyfe

But nowe we playe welle, I’ll instede bete mye wyfe
Click to expand...

Bravo :D
 
Glad CW team talks are not in the same language or we are f***ed:p
 
itsinyerblood said:
I can see that Foxy's influence is rubbing off on Nade.

The only thing lacking Nade's is what melody are we meant to sing this along to?
Click to expand...

I'm thinking we should stand and simply recite it with the appropriate meter. It would be so different and whacky that people wouldn't know what the fuck to think, and hopefully it'd put the other team off enough for us to bang a few past them.

Blades fans are a cultured bunch so I don't think learning the articulation of middle English should be too much of a struggle. Motivation makes a big impact when it comes to learning levels and based on my experienced with the average Blades fan, the vast majority will be extremely motivated by the idea of a poetry recital.
 
Nade said:
I'm thinking we should stand and simply recite it with the appropriate meter. It would be so different and whacky that people wouldn't know what the fuck to think, and hopefully it'd put the other team off enough for us to bang a few past them.

Blades fans are a cultured bunch so I don't think learning the articulation of middle English should be too much of a struggle. Motivation makes a big impact when it comes to learning levels and based on my experienced with the average Blades fan, the vast majority will be extremely motivated by the idea of a poetry recital.
Click to expand...

A wonderful effort but you are expecting us to remember all of it and pronounce all of it when we can't even sing the Greasy Chip butty without half the kop finishing seconds before the other half and the OOOH at the end been out of sink! Or there's the SHEFFIELD UNITED, SHEFFIELD UNTIED... which after a few times gets to fast to shout!?
 
Nade said:
I've written a new rhyme for us to recite on the Kop. The meter and the language might be a bit of a stretch, but with a bit of practice I think it can be the anthem for many a fan. It is inspired by the works of Geoffrey Chaucer.

The Metye Blydese

A Sheffeld mitel knyf I has in mye hande.

As I cot intoe a pye it tastese veyre grande

I walke downe the layne and see the Laver stande

The metye bladese ere is wheyre they playe

Sometymes by nighte; ofte by daye

Outside the stande with my pye I nowe dwell

Surrowndede by rede and whyt apparele

I soake up the sphere as I hear a manne

Showteds lowdlye ‘thipunde yer matche programe’

I goe for a slashe in the backe of the koppe

Mi pynis so colde I thenk it been choppe

Fycking bich of a tickete layde lyed to me

Whene she sayde id be ayble to see

I sitte in my sete reyt behinde a pillare

My vewe is so shyt it cude mek me a kyllare

Starte to watche the gyme that is playd

And get angrye at the mighte blaydes

I get workede upe vyrily angrye

At unyted instede of those closeste to me

I get angrye becos shyte is my lyfe

But nowe we playe welle, I’ll instede bete mye wyfe
Click to expand...
This has to be sung to the tune of Greensleeves (better known as "Ice Cream Van Music", from the album "Now That's What I Call Ice Cream Van Music 2017"
 
Nade said:
I've written a new rhyme for us to recite on the Kop. The meter and the language might be a bit of a stretch, but with a bit of practice I think it can be the anthem for many a fan. It is inspired by the works of Geoffrey Chaucer.

The Metye Blydese

A Sheffeld mitel knyf I has in mye hande.

As I cot intoe a pye it tastese veyre grande

I walke downe the layne and see the Laver stande

The metye bladese ere is wheyre they playe

Sometymes by nighte; ofte by daye

Outside the stande with my pye I nowe dwell

Surrowndede by rede and whyt apparele

I soake up the sphere as I hear a manne

Showteds lowdlye ‘thipunde yer matche programe’

I goe for a slashe in the backe of the koppe

Mi pynis so colde I thenk it been choppe

Fycking bich of a tickete layde lyed to me

Whene she sayde id be ayble to see

I sitte in my sete reyt behinde a pillare

My vewe is so shyt it cude mek me a kyllare

Starte to watche the gyme that is playd

And get angrye at the mighte blaydes

I get workede upe vyrily angrye

At unyted instede of those closeste to me

I get angrye becos shyte is my lyfe

But nowe we playe welle, I’ll instede bete mye wyfe
Click to expand...

I salute you my friend! Bravo......BRAVO!

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HighfieldBlade said:
This has to be sung to the tune of Greensleeves (better known as "Ice Cream Van Music", from the album "Now That's What I Call Ice Cream Van Music 2017"
Click to expand...

There are a couple of lines where I've fucked up the meter, but with a bit of tinkering I agree the tune of Greensleeves should work quite well.
 
Nade said:
I'm thinking we should stand and simply recite it with the appropriate meter. It would be so different and whacky that people wouldn't know what the fuck to think, and hopefully it'd put the other team off enough for us to bang a few past them.

Blades fans are a cultured bunch so I don't think learning the articulation of middle English should be too much of a struggle. Motivation makes a big impact when it comes to learning levels and based on my experienced with the average Blades fan, the vast majority will be extremely motivated by the idea of a poetry recital.
Click to expand...
Could go well with a bit of Elgar in the background, Nimrod?
 
The Millers Tale would be a good one, telling the story of how much flour he'd have to mill to make that fat fuck an extra large bread cake for his lard sandwich.
 
Nade said:
I've written a new rhyme for us to recite on the Kop. The meter and the language might be a bit of a stretch, but with a bit of practice I think it can be the anthem for many a fan. It is inspired by the works of Geoffrey Chaucer.

The Metye Blydese

A Sheffeld mitel knyf I has in mye hande.

As I cot intoe a pye it tastese veyre grande

I walke downe the layne and see the Laver stande

The metye bladese ere is wheyre they playe

Sometymes by nighte; ofte by daye

Outside the stande with my pye I nowe dwell

Surrowndede by rede and whyt apparele

I soake up the sphere as I hear a manne

Showteds lowdlye ‘thipunde yer matche programe’

I goe for a slashe in the backe of the koppe

Mi pynis so colde I thenk it been choppe

Fycking bich of a tickete layde lyed to me

Whene she sayde id be ayble to see

I sitte in my sete reyt behinde a pillare

My vewe is so shyt it cude mek me a kyllare

Starte to watche the gyme that is playd

And get angrye at the mighte blaydes

I get workede upe vyrily angrye

At unyted instede of those closeste to me

I get angrye becos shyte is my lyfe

But nowe we playe welle, I’ll instede bete mye wyfe
Click to expand...
I could accompany you if you have the music sheets for a mandolin
 
I'm a little surprised the spelling and grammar police haven't been all over this yet!
 
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