Missed Seeing a Goal?

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Bert

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It has only happened twice to Bert in something like 1,000 matches.

At Wembley v Hull,
Bert went to the bar to replenish his stock of red wine (£5, small bottle of donkey piss) when he met some Swedish Blades so he bought them all a drink and missed our first goal.
He assumed it was Hull who'd scored so he walked back up the steps to be greeted with the sight of 35,000 Unitedites going bonkers. Grrr.

1968 at Hillsborough, he went to see Jimmy Greaves, went for a piss and missed his bloody goal.

No doubt others have had similar tragic experiences.
 

Well I doubt even Jimmy Greaves could score fromt feckin urinal

Oh yes he could.

Fortunately Bert had seen him score the year before at the FA Cup Semi Final.
 
I think I missed Charlie Hartfield's one and only goal for the Blades (Vs Villa?) as we got to the Ground late.

Score us score a late-ish winner against Ipswich (Devlin cross, no idea who scored) from the gap between the Kop and the South Stand, as we were on our way out. We had some family engagement or other, and had only been allowed to the match on the understanding we left before full time. I think the final score was 2-1 Blades.

Don't think I've ever missed one due to a piss break or whatever.
 
The Man City FA Cup tie at home, Sven in charge for them

Went for a piss, missed the Balloon goal
 
I'll be among around 800 plus of us who were denied the opportunity of watching John Fleck and Leon score his first in the Bouncing Day massacre by those wonderful people at SYP with some additional help from a couple of twats dressed as Stewards. In the second half I went to relieve myself and missed Leons second so in terms of goals viewed we lost 2-1.

Nothing however will replace being able to witness the moment when the ginger genius turned the Pigs inside out to score our third. I was there that day to see 3 sides of a pig infested ground silenced within an instance. It was worth missing the three goals for that alone.
 
I used to travel a lot and it seemed my jobs often coincided with an away mid week match. I happened to be in Bristol but had no idea where good parking was, parked miles away and arrived at the ground just after someone had scored I think it was Bristol. Clearly because it was a miserable game so I left a few minutes early. It was an equaliser!
 
My brother missed possibly one of the best goals seen at Bramall Lane in recent times, Billy's volley against Leeds last season.

Told him not to bet on public transport and give himself time, he didn't, I saw it, he heard it from behind the Kop :D
 
My brother missed possibly one of the best goals seen at Bramall Lane in recent times, Billy's volley against Leeds last season.

Told him not to bet on public transport and give himself time, he didn't, I saw it, he heard it from behind the Kop :D

On a similar note, the amount of people that missed Lee Evans' once in a million strike around me was genuinely hilarious.
 
January 1970 (my first match as a committed Blade) my dad thought a late goal by Gil Reece would be the only goal of the game so he decided that we should leave for home. As soon as we left the BLUT, there was a roar from the ground and a steward told my dad that we had scored again (Addison)

Nov 1970, missed TC's goal in the 1st half at Blackburn cos my dad had set off from Dronfield far too late.

December 1975. The gates had closed by the time we arrived at Baseball ground so my dad pleaded with the ticket office that we would be allowed in. There was a roar and then we were told that the Blades had just scored (Woody). We also missed McAlister's penalty save (Charlie George took the penalty). The staff then allowed us in through the corridors from the office to the terraces.
 
2 also:
- Corky vs Forest in a really drab 1-0 at home where I thought nowt would happen if I went for a piss
- Our last at home vs Fulham in the 5-4 defeat as I had to go to get a lift home
 

Dean Ham***ds goal against shrews whilst 4-1 down,couldn’t face 2nd half and I was 5 mins from home...truly awful times
 
I missed the whole of Uniteds 6 nil thrashing of Spurs in the 90s, because I did my back in having a snowball fight at school. It was so bad I went to the Doctors he told me not to go and my parents concurred.

It didn't worry me, I thought at the time we've no chance of beating Spurs anýway... Doh!
 
i rarely to go the toilet during the game because i know i will miss something. my neice went to the toilet at 1-0 Southend came back to 3-0 southend & world war 3

when im listening at work i always miss the united goals i heard 1 of utds goals in 5-1 JPT win v notts county & recently heard none of 4 goals in stoke game. remember missing the beattie 2008 sheff derby equaliser because my auntie had to leave early she gives me a lift. 2 regrets about that still think i shouldve walked home. & being so angry may have shoved her across the road when i heard the roar.

Finally i went to the toilet & missed 1 of tonges goals v liverpool in 2003. cant remember which 1 but i remember charging out of toilet nearly coming a cropper on wet toilet roll. hoping for somekind of replay. obviously only 11yrs early for that. tonge i remember it was this no idea if he celebrated it 1st 2nd or both
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As said in another thread some time back, I missed Flo scoring the winner at Anfield due to going for a huge dump.
Also, on a slightly different take on these things, I went for a piss whilst watching Oakland A’s baseball and missed Jose Canseco, one of the greats of the game, scoring a home run.
 
It has only happened twice to Bert in something like 1,000 matches.

At Wembley v Hull,
Bert went to the bar to replenish his stock of red wine (£5, small bottle of donkey piss) when he met some Swedish Blades so he bought them all a drink and missed our first goal.
He assumed it was Hull who'd scored so he walked back up the steps to be greeted with the sight of 35,000 Unitedites going bonkers. Grrr.

1968 at Hillsborough, he went to see Jimmy Greaves, went for a piss and missed his bloody goal.

No doubt others have had similar tragic experiences.

That’s a pretty impressive record. Although In both cases, Bert’s missed goals were due to the need to take in, or let out, liquid. Tip: Bert should get a hip flask and wear incontinence pads.
 
It has only happened twice to Bert in something like 1,000 matches.

At Wembley v Hull,
Bert went to the bar to replenish his stock of red wine (£5, small bottle of donkey piss) when he met some Swedish Blades so he bought them all a drink and missed our first goal.
He assumed it was Hull who'd scored so he walked back up the steps to be greeted with the sight of 35,000 Unitedites going bonkers. Grrr.

1968 at Hillsborough, he went to see Jimmy Greaves, went for a piss and missed his bloody goal.

No doubt others have had similar tragic experiences.
Same match as you. Went for a piss just before half time to miss the rush, missed our goal.
 
When Peter Withe played for us he had a little spell of scoring very early goals. I missed a couple of those. So I started getting there early. That solved the problem. He hardly ever scored again (except when he came back on loan whilst still our player and put 2 past us!).:mad:
 
I missed Glyn Hodges superb chipped winner v Man Utd in the FA Cup 5th Round in 1993 as I'd gone to fetch me and mate drinks from the back of the kop. Fortunately it was on MOTD too.

Worst one was my first away game v Hull at Boothferry Park in October 1983. I was only 12 at the time, it pissed it down all day and got stuck in traffic, arrived to a packed ground 10 minutes late and it was already 1-1. Genuinely unsafe terracing, at one point we got a corner and I was pushed all the way from the back right down to the front of the terrace. Deciding it was too dangerous we spent the rest of the game getting piss wet through in the uncovered section. By 80 minutes, we had enough of that and the game was shite so we left. Got down to the turnstiles and a big roar went up signalling Hull had gone 2-1 up. By the time we got back to the car it was 4-1 to Hull. So to recap, travelled all the way to Hull, got piss wet through and missed all 5 goals...... beat that!

Say what you like about yearning for terraces and atmosphere but it was downright dangerous that day, especially for kids.
 
Missed the first 3 at Brentford last season, i wasn't even all that late. The cheer for each of ours was much louder than the Brentford one so i was convinced we were 2-1 down.
 
i rarely to go the toilet during the game because i know i will miss something. my neice went to the toilet at 1-0 Southend came back to 3-0 southend & world war 3

when im listening at work i always miss the united goals i heard 1 of utds goals in 5-1 JPT win v notts county & recently heard none of 4 goals in stoke game. remember missing the beattie 2008 sheff derby equaliser because my auntie had to leave early she gives me a lift. 2 regrets about that still think i shouldve walked home. & being so angry may have shoved her across the road when i heard the roar.

Finally i went to the toilet & missed 1 of tonges goals v liverpool in 2003. cant remember which 1 but i remember charging out of toilet nearly coming a cropper on wet toilet roll. hoping for somekind of replay. obviously only 11yrs early for that. tonge i remember it was this no idea if he celebrated it 1st 2nd or both
View attachment 54183

Toilet, what's all this toilet business?
They are called bogs at football grounds.
 
New Years day 1955 v Newcastle at BDTBL. My dad and his mate (Uncle mick 's dad) got in the ground 10 minutes after the kick off. They asked spectators for the score "4-0 to United" was the reply. Both refused to believe them and kept on asking other spectators before eventually realised they had missed 4 goals (we scored 4 in the first 8 minutes). Final score was 6-2 to us.
 
Went for a piss at Bristol City a few years ago, heard a cheer just as I’d got into the concourse, dashed back to find we’d scored (possibly Henderson). Went back into the concourse for my piss and missed our second goal barely a minute later.

Bristol City pulled one back and then got a last minute equaliser. Pissed off at throwing away two points, I walked out, and heard the cheer for our injury time winner while out in the car park.
 

It has only happened twice to Bert in something like 1,000 matches.

At Wembley v Hull,
Bert went to the bar to replenish his stock of red wine (£5, small bottle of donkey piss) when he met some Swedish Blades so he bought them all a drink and missed our first goal.
He assumed it was Hull who'd scored so he walked back up the steps to be greeted with the sight of 35,000 Unitedites going bonkers. Grrr.

1968 at Hillsborough, he went to see Jimmy Greaves, went for a piss and missed his bloody goal.

No doubt others have had similar tragic experiences.

Missed a fair few, highlights include -

Missed our 2nd against Hull at Wembley to beat the queue at the bar.

Missed Hulse’s opener against Liverpool (first game back in the Prem) coming back in after half time.

The worst though was Duffy’s goal at Hillsborough. Thought their equaliser was an opportune moment to go for a piss.

Great memries.
 

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