Funny things you've overheard in the stands

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Not that funny, more moronic really... home game v QPR January 1991. We were kicking towards the kop and their keeper had just made a few saves. Play continues and crowd quietens down, apart from one lad a few rows behind who pipes up "Eh wunt it be rayt funny if their goalie died".
 

Doubt it - I'd have recognised / remembered the twat even then !?!

Game was September 82 (1-0 win) & according to thickypedia NA was on Tranmere's books at that time - as you say he went to Wigan later (1985)

Does beg the question as to whether he played for Tranmere agin us ?
Would have been 1981 if it was div 4.
 
Was stood on kop with a few mates , the ref was fucking appalling, we wouldn’t have got a kick in a stampede of the fucker , everyone was fuming and after about 80 minutes of utter frustration
Steg ,my mate let out a shout
Ref that about as much good as a left handed wank
 
Someone this season without fail screamed "get somebody up" when defending a corner. Hasn't been a single time it would've fell even close to whoever was 'up'.
 
Mid 80's home game, HT had come, was very similar to one of Bart simpsons prank calls to Moe's, announcement over tannoy system,
"would Dr White please report immediately to the changing rooms...", kop just burst out laughing....
There were at time on telly a lot of adverts for these
55123
 
My older brother refused to accept that Michael Tonge was a decent footballer. The kindest description he had for Tongey was that he was a "nesh bastard".

One particular game, our kid was in full critical mode and Tongey, bless him, appeared to pull out of a tackle, at which point, my bruv got to his feet and screamed "c'mon Tongey, get some fuckin blood on thi studs for once". Priceless.
 
My favourite goes to this grey haired bloke who used to sit couple rows behind us on the kop, it was while we were in league 1, either under Adkins or in Clough’s last year. Was a night match against (I think) Shrewsbury and a lad with bleach blonde hair was getting a bit of joy down our right side.

After the second or third time he got past his man this bloke shouts “Hit him! He looks fuckin German!!”

Made me and all the blades in a few row radius of him burst out laughing.
 
"Coady - you're fucking shit."

Bizarre abuse thrown at Connor Coady in his final game for the blades. Bloke went on to rant about how Coady was a fucking shit Liverpool show pony.

Coady went on to make both goals in a 2-0 win.
 
Funniest thing I've heard or seen in the stands was..."If yer nooooot fuckin boouuncin, if yer not fuckin bouncin your a Blaaade, if nooooottt fuckin boouuncin, if your not fuckin bouncing your a Blade", then it stopped. 🤣
 
Notts County away, the first League One season. Leaving their away end, a load of local lads, must have been no older than 15, decided to come round to the away end to pick a scrap. I was walking out with some man mountain of a Blade.

"Oh, fuck off - does your Mum know you're out?"
 
Back in the 1st division and George Long was in net. There was a guy who sits behind me who hated him to such a degree that when Long came out of his area one day to head a ball away it fell to a player on the half way line. George was 15 yards outside his area and this guy literally had a melt down shouting to the opposition player 'quick, lob him'

He became quite irrate when he realised it was a 1st divsion player he headed it out to. I did wonder for a while whether it was sitwell but I believe he doesn't sit in the South Stand.
 
Heard a bloke on the kop shouting "That's why he can't make it in the prem, he's shit" after Norwood gave away the ball, this was fairly soon after we'd signed him.
Same with us in the South Stand. Normally a season ticket holder that sits directly behind me but for some reason it was someone different - slating Mcgoldrick and Norwood at every opportunity.

Tried to confront his idiocy but then realised it's impossible to win an argument against a stupid person
 

Back in the 1st division and George Long was in net. There was a guy who sits behind me who hated him to such a degree that when Long came out of his area one day to head a ball away it fell to a player on the half way line. George was 15 yards outside his area and this guy literally had a melt down shouting to the opposition player 'quick, lob him'

He became quite irrate when he realised it was a 1st divsion player he headed it out to. I did wonder for a while whether it was sitwell but I believe he doesn't sit in the South Stand.
Our promotion hero?? No I'm on john st, his spectacular worse was a 3-3 draw at home to crewe that's when I knew he was rubbish. The only person I've ever had a go at during a game was Willie falconer he was a real special shade of shit.
 
When the kop was turned into an all seater, there were 4 lads sat in front of us who were real characters, one especially. They all wore yellow hats. The loudest had a regular tendency to have a go at the linesman. His opening line always used to make us smile as he balled "linesman, LINESMAN, look at mi when am talking to di" :)

He was also the first guy I remember who took a bugle to the game. Others may remember that. He was no Acker Bilk but he did a job:)
 
One for the older Blades to remember and brought back to me by the ‘OFFSIDE!’ post.

On that night when TC sat on the ball when we were 5-0 up against the then Champions Arsenal, the brilliant Alan Ball’s squeaky voice could be heard above all others berating his teammates. This resulted in most of the Kop shouting ‘ALAN!’ In the highest pitched voice that they could muster whenever he touched the ball for the rest of the game. It was like a scene from Monty Python. Fecking hilarious.
God that was funny thank you for reminding me .
 
"Gerrit Forrad YOO NITED"

"RUBBISH YOO NITED"

Some dickhead on back of south stand every match near press boxes.
I can tell you exactly where he sits, what he looks like, his match day routine & his intellectual profile ( which In all fairness your initial post has identified) & capacity for 'debate'
Just praying that I (or he) is afforded the opportunity to re-locate - my current best option appears to be Leppings Lane (lower tier)
 
I can tell you exactly where he sits, what he looks like, his match day routine & his intellectual profile ( which In all fairness your initial post has identified) & capacity for 'debate'
Just praying that I (or he) is afforded the opportunity to re-locate - my current best option appears to be Leppings Lane (lower tier)

haha, always the same guy, I used to sit right at the back, right next to the press boxes and could here him all game, every game, so fucking annoying. One of the positives of moving to Spain :D
 
Birmingham at home last season, really windy night.
Norwood had a bit of a mare and overhit everything. Bloke behind me shouts "What's tha picked him for Wilder, tha knows he can't play in't wind!"
 
When we lost 2-1 at Stevenage every time their keeper had the ball a lad in front of me would shout (Chris) Day you're gay.Still makes me laugh every time he's on a televised match.
 
When we lost 2-1 at Stevenage every time their keeper had the ball a lad in front of me would shout (Chris) Day you're gay.Still makes me laugh every time he's on a televised match.

Nowt wrong with being gay.

However, there is everything wrong with being a Stevenage keeper.
 
When the kop was turned into an all seater, there were 4 lads sat in front of us who were real characters, one especially. They all wore yellow hats. The loudest had a regular tendency to have a go at the linesman. His opening line always used to make us smile as he balled "linesman, LINESMAN, look at mi when am talking to di" :)

He was also the first guy I remember who took a bugle to the game. Others may remember that. He was no Acker Bilk but he did a job:)

Once away at Oldham and one of their players was laid out injured for quite some time. After about three or four minutes one of our lads started playing the Last Post on his bugle, was that him? Loads of us stood to attention and saluted, it only seemed right.
 
Once away at Oldham and one of their players was laid out injured for quite some time. After about three or four minutes one of our lads started playing the Last Post on his bugle, was that him? Loads of us stood to attention and saluted, it only seemed right.
Probably, Bannerman. Had a daft as a brush sort of humour and just the sort of thing he'd do. Shame he doesn't bring his bugle anymore and doesn't sit near us. Was always good value.:)
 

Mansfield no 9 Arrrrrhhhhh coming from the top after he swung a leg and missed the ball early in the first half. Everytime the ball went towards him after he had the same rendition.Funny as feck at the time. He was also subbed before half time IIRC.
 

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